Foursome

Previously on Foursome,

a girly sleepover was used as a front.

Now I'm gonna have to shove wine coolers

down their GD swallow sticks

and trick them into admitting they're whores

who've been hooking up with my boyfriend.

Make sure that Alec knows I'm sleeping at Greer's tonight.

And an escape room uncovered clues.

How about Alec joining you and Andie on your date?

Don't worry, man, I'm not gonna narc on you.

Ow!

But while neither of our nights were smooth...

You lose!

Drink.

Kent and I gave each other happy endings.

Dakota, slow down.

My creases are sweating.

No can do, Lou Pearlman.

I need to enact phase nine...

Thousand...

Of Golden Goose.

Show Mr. Zapp I'm a man.

I'm an adult man.

A legal, 18-year-old, adult senior man.

You sleep with a night light.

I didn't say I believe in monsters,

but I'm not trying to find out.

You need to get it together.

I'm about to be direct as

That's what real men do.

So I need to know, are you with me?

I'm with you.

Do you have my back?

I've got your back.

Alright, let's go bag my golden goose.

Ooh, I meant figuratively.

I'm not actually going with you.

Fine, who needs you?

Get some on three.

One, two.

Get some!

Get out of my way.

Don't say anything, just listen.

I know you think of me as one of your students,

but just because that definition is techinically correct

doesn't make me a kid.

I'm a man,

a man who knows when someone is sending him signs.

No more beating around the bush.

Yours or mine?

I'm ready.

I've been ready for this my whole...

I've never thought of you as just a student.

Fat-Ass Ms. Willie?

Ooh, be an overflowing tub and spill.

Where's Mr. Zapp?

He's a substitute,

he's working at another school.

But my plantar fasciitis is gone, I'm back,

ready to mold young minds.

Gone?

What do you mean Gone?

Gone elsewhere.

He's subbing physics.

Oh no, he can't be gone.

Ooh, now you gone did it.

Dakota, calm down.

Calm down?!

Calm down?!

My golden goose has flown the coop!

Bitch, you better break your foot,

get the mumps, bird flu, mad cow disease yourself,

I don't care what.

Get your ass back in bed and get Mr. Zapp back at Brayer.

We got another code blue.

Who's gonna get it this time?

I will take care of it, Ms. Willie.

It's Gonna Be May.

Uh, have I mentioned you're a really good kisser?

No, must be because your tongue's tied.

Ew.

Uh, pull my hair.

What?

Uh, try new things.

I don't know, it feels a bit forced.

Right, yeah, I get that.

Yeah.

Ah, ow, what is it with you and hair pulling?

I just thought maybe it's...

Your turn.

Uh...

Is everything okay?

Because you were into it last time.

No, yeah, yeah, no.

Everything's gravy, groovy.

Everything's fine.

I...

The bell.

Ms. Ebison is gonna straight up murder me

if I'm late to class again.

I gotta go.

The bell doesn't ring for another 10 minutes.

Did you just fake bell me?

What? No.

You're cute.

Get your hearing checked or something.

I don't know.

Bye Bye Bye.

Why couldn't I just tell him that I have my period?

Wait, you have your period?

Yeah, but that's not the point.

If I just told him, then he would've left it alone

and we could've had a fun make-out sesh.

But no, not me.

I had to pretend that the bell rang

and tell him he was deaf.

Oh my God, that is so exciting!

Court, you really need to start

actually listening to stories.

I was.

Phil-Andie-thropy, we are on the same cycle,

which is Miracle on Elm Street because I'm on No-Ov.

Court, didn't the FDA recall that birth control?

Yeah, but I only get my scarlet wing once a year,

so totally worth it.

Hey, Flamingo.

Hi.

Imogen, care to share with the class?

I finally got it.

Why guys have balls?

What? No, ew.

I will never understand that.

My menstrual cycle.

Imogen, your first period!

Congratulations!

Welcome to the worst.

First period?

How old are you?

My mom didn't get hers until she was 29.

Don't worry, little puppy.

I guess it just means

God Must've Spent a Little More Time on You.

I can't believe we're all in sync.

We are scientifically BFFs, fact.

Okay, how can you be so happy about all of this?

Sanitary napkins are not sanitary,

and tampons are just filled with chemicals.

And everything smells like metal.

It Makes Me Ill.

Don't worry, little squirrel.

We're gonna help you get through this.

Absolutely.

We'll take a period day.

You know, like a personal day except for your ketchup stain.

Really, you would do that?

Yeah, of course.

We'll help you through this, don't worry.

Let's get this period party started!

Woo!

Ow.

Dakota, closed flowers never bloom.

I don't care.

I can tell you're going through something.

No, I'm not.

Dakota, knock knock?

Ms. Cardigan, let me in.

No one's home.

What's this sign say right here?

Your name spelled wrong.

You got your degree at the mall.

Okay, that's true, I'll give you that.

Dakota, you know, you're what I like to call an oreo.

Hold up, do over.

And this time, don't be racist.

Hard on the top, hard on the bottom,

but you got a soft inside, okay?

Am I coloring in the lines here?

Hard to tell.

Obviously you came here for a reason.

Yeah, Janitor Wilkins forced me to be here

because I almost smacked a bitch.

I know you got a heart owie.

And the only way I can fix it is if you open up

and you let some of the poison out.

Okay.

There was a boy, man, who I wanted to be with.

And he clearly returned those feelings,

everyone saw.

Then he just up and left,

not so much as a goodbye.

I guess it's, it just...

It's Tearing Up My Heart!

There you go, see?

Got some emotion out.

Now I can help you.

Okay, now just point to the emoji

that best describes how you're feeling.

What the

This is the I've got a hard feeling chart.

You said you can make me feel better,