The Tourist

Hello?

- You have to-- you have to find me.

- Uh-- - There's not much time.

- Hello? - You have to--

I can't hear--

Hello? - You have to help me.

You have to try to get to me before--

- Look, you need to tell me what this is about, okay?

What--what--what-- what is going on?

- I'm in an oil drum, and I'm buried underground, man.

- You're what? Buried underground?

Listen.

Listen--listen!

The battery is about to die. - Okay--slow down, slow down.

Look, uh, how-- how do you know me?

- Okay, listen, Murray Waters. We drove through Murray Waters.

Murray Waters?

Where?

You come get me.

You owe me that. You're the reason I'm here.

Huh?

Look for a--a-- a fucking waterfall.

- Waterfall? - Look for the waterfa--

No.

No, no.

- Ah! F--

Agh!

Fuck!

- You know absolutely nothing. Zero.

Remember that, and you will get where you need to be.

Now, maybe that's out in the field,

like me chasing "bitterflies," as my pop used to say,

or maybe you want to climb the ladder,

make commissioner, like he did.

Doesn't matter,

so long as you remember you know absolutely nothing.

Today's your first day

with the Major Crime Investigation Branch,

and this job is not about instinct.

It's about finding evidence.

This is not the time for--

Excuse me a second.

Hi, love. How are things?

Oh, forgot we ordered those.

Oh, that's good.

And Jimmy's exams?

Are you kidding me?

Yeah, it's hard to know, isn't it, with this stuff?

Yeah--well, I was thinking maybe, uh, lamb.

Yeah, you know that recipe, the Moroccan one?

Do we have any, uh, ras el hanout?

Or ra-- I think it's ras el hanout.

It's a--it's-- it's a Moroccan spice.

Oh, sweetheart,

I've got another call coming in.

I'll--I'll buzz you right back.

Good morning, sir.

Nah, they'll wait.

Yeah, okay.

Right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay, just one question.

Where the hell is Burnt Ridge?

Jesus Christ.

Everything all right there?

- Fine. Yeah.

- Here we are. - Okay, thanks.

Hi, love.

Hi.

So you, uh-- you left this in my car.

It's nice to see that you're making friends, though.

- Do you know the way to Murray Waters?

Um...

yeah, it's, like, a four-hour drive from here, why?

Fuck.

Okay, good talk.

- Sorry, I just really need to get there.

Something really weird is going on.

I mean, like, next-level fucking batshit crazy.

It turns out, before the accident,

I hid a-- hid a phone inside of this guy.

The phone starts ringing, so I picked up,

and there's a man on the other end who says he knows me.

Probably should have said this before, but he--

he's-- he's buried underground.

Okay.

Uh...

yeah, that--that is a lot. - It is a lot.

- Yeah. Um...

Tell me on the way, and, uh, start from the beginning.

- Wait, what? You--you're gonna take me?

- Well, I wouldn't get too excited about it.

Seats are murder on your arse, air-con's fucked,

windows, they don't close, but, you know, for 100 bucks,

I was pretty lucky to get one with a steering wheel.

But it's, like--

it's, like, an eight-hour round trip.

- Yeah, I've got nowhere else to be.

Plus, uh,

you are the most interesting thing to happen around here

in a really long time, so...

- Well, I'd have shot him on the roadside,

but some asshole saw the crash.

Well, shit, I don't know. Maybe--

Look, call me when you got a clue.

Hey, boss.

Hey.

What you doing here? I thought you was off.

- Yeah, yeah. Oh, it's--

thing is, I just need to talk with you, Billy.

That's the thing.

Oh, I sure hate this. I do.

Hate what?

- I-- I saw you.

I was coming back to the office.

I was gone ten, I think, and...

I'd left my headphones,

and, you know, I--I run--

you--you know that I'm a runner, and...

Yeah, I came back to get 'em and you were...

Get to it.

- You were driving the truck out of the lot.

The 2IV.

Next day, Charlie says,

"Oh, there's been a break-in. Someone stole 2IV."

And I'm going, "Eh, what break-in?"

'Cause I mean, what-- what I saw.

Yeah, I know what I saw.

- Still don't know why you're here.

You said it was stolen,

but it wasn't stolen, was it, Billy?

You just said it was

so you could claim the money.

And--and I'm loyal, me, man, yeah.

I--I can keep a secret. Take that shit to my grave.

Just that me and Elle were really hoping

that we could take the boys to a nicer school.

It's just-- - Okay, I get it.

You're trying to squeeze me.

No.

Yeah, maybe I am.

I sweat my balls off for you-- years.

Now...

it's my time.

It's my time.

Well, okay, then.

We can make an arrangement, son.

But you're gonna have to promise me

you're gonna take that with you to the grave.

Yeah, on my life, Billy.

- Well, I-- I got something

in that truck over there you're gonna want to see.

- Yeah? - Yeah, go take a look.

But you walk away with that,

and we're done.

You keep your mouth shut.

What am I looking for?

Uh, Helen Chambers speaking.

Hey, I'm Cath Bauri.

I'm a nurse at Cooper Springs Hospital.

You asked me to call if anyone came looking

for that amnesia patient.

Uh, yeah, of course.

What happened? Who came in?

- Um, an American guy, cowboy hat and all.

He was kind of weird, to be honest with you.

- It's--it's just about that guy who lost his memory.

- You're supposed to be off, aren't you?

Helping keep me distracted? - He didn't, um,

leave a name or number or anything.

Sorry, Cath, um, I'm--

I'm not actually on duty today.

Uh, maybe you can call the station.

- Oh. Oh, okay.

Um, I mean, you asked me to call you.

What if he knows who this bloke is?

Have you got a charger?

- Glove compartment. - Excuse me?

- I-- not you, sorry.

Um, I was just--

I'm sorry, and thank you for calling, and sorry.

- Why's this person bothering you?

You're not a ruddy detective.

- 'Cause no one else seems to care, and maybe I--

- Oh, dear. - Oh.

Sorry about that.

- It's yourself you're letting down, Hel.

Okay, look, moving forward,

I want this burger wrapper to be like our testament.

Like our Treaty of Versailles.

That was, like, a--like, a really important treaty.

Oh, I have actually heard--

- I want you to keep this wrapper in the car.

And every time you look at it, I want you to remember

we're in this fight together.

You're getting ketchup on me.

- Together. - Right.

Together.