Il Commissario Montalbano

Who is it?

Who is it?

- Mr. Commissioner! - Let me in.

What's happened?

- Can you hide me? - Why?

Don't you know?

- What? - The Mafia has taken over.

What?

How did you think this wretched country would end up!

It's come to this!

Bring me a towel.

Holy mother!

- Good evening - TotÚ Riina?

Forgive the hour and manner, but I don't have much time,

there's a helicopter waiting to take me to Rome

to form the new government.

I already have a few names:

Bernardo Provenzano Vice President,

Leoluca Bagarella for Defense,

a Caruana brother for ForeignAffairs.

I've come to ask a question

and you, Commissioner Montalbano,

must say yes or no, right now.

Will you be my Minister of the Interior?

Well, what do you say?

Sir, if you say yes to this criminal,

I swear I'll kill you right here, in person, personally.

Sir, open up, it's Catarella!

Open up, I'm outside here,

it's pourin', I'm gettin' drenched.

- Who is it? - It's Catarella, open up.

I'm gettin' all drenched.

Shut up!

Go make some really strong coffee, tell me later,

I'm taking a shower.

- Don't worry... - Go!

Can I talk now?

Sir, they found a dead body!

- Afresh one? - I don't know, they didn't say.

- Where? - In the country, Pizzutello area.

- Aren't our guys are there? - Yes, Fazio and Augello.

Then why come bustin' my balls?

Forgive me,

but Mr. Augello said to tell you

your presence in person, personally is indispensable.

You didn't answer, so I came for you in the jeep.

- Why the jeep? - Only a jeep can get there.

Where are we going, to Vietnam?

I don't know,

but Augello said to wear boots,

a hood and even a rain-coat.

Even?

- Is there any more? - Right away.

What a bummer!

"How much do I get? I'll turn him over to you."

"How much do I get? And I'll turn him over to you."

What the hell are you saying?

When I drive, it's natural to rehearse my lines.

For a month, I've been in a "grammatic society"!

What?

It's where they do a play of plays.

- Dramatic society! - Yeah.

- What are you doing? - The Passion of Christ.

That's when the Lord was killed on the cross,

but I'm not playing Jesus, I'm short, dark...

Well, you understand.

You said: "How much do I get if I give turn him over to you?"

You're playing Judas?

I didn't want to, I swear!

Watch the road!

It's muddy, the road's slippery and betraying!

Are we playing hide and seek?

They said to stop where and when I see their jeep.

Honk.

The horn doesn't work.

Good grief!

Don't get mad, I'll look for them,

ifthe jeep's here, they're around somewhere.

Good.

Sir!

- Sir! - What did you do?

Sorry, I parked too close to the edge.

- Are you hurt? - No, still at your command!

There's Fazio.

Commissioner, we're here!

I'll go that way.

- What did you do? - I parked on the edge.

Just look at you!

Catarella!

Fazio, keep it concise, because I'm already pissed off.

Pasquale Ajena found the body,

it's his land, he comes every day.

Could I know where the body is?

It should be up there, about 150 meters.

What, it should be?

It's been raining till now

and Mr. Augello said to wait for you.

He said to wait?

Well, Mr. Augello, can we see this body?

- Let's stay, this is fun. - Come on!

Wanna spend the whole day here?

So the bag was buried

and the water brought it up?

Yeah, that's right.

I was on my way home,

when I saw the bag.

It was big and black, like the ones for trash.

How did you know there was a body? Did you open it?

No need, the bag was ripped

and I saw a foot.

So I ran home

and phoned you.

What time did you find the bag?

About 6 a.m.

It took you two hours to go home and call us?

We got your call at 8 o'clock.

Meantime, you didn't call someone to take back the body?

No way! I didn't call anyone.

Then what did you do?

I thought if it was good to call or not.

Why?

There's always trouble when the fuzz are involved.

How dare you?

Don't call me fuzz!

- He'd better watch his mouth! - Mimi, calm down.

Mr. Ajena,

why isn't the bag here anymore?

Commissioner,

maybe water or dirt dragged it down,

or someone came and took it back.

Okay, let's go.

Thank you.

Sir!

I slipped!

I saw that!

Sir!

I found him!

- Who? - The dead man!

Good!

Fazio, take care ofit.

- I'm leaving. - But we have to investigate!

Use your brain:

Ifthe body were fresh, I could be useful,

but who knows when or how he was killed!

You have to call the coroner, the DA and Forensics.

- They'll take two hours. - What can I do?

Why did you tell Catarella I was indispensable here?

I thought you could...

I'll tell you why, you wanted to bust my balls!

You wanted me to slop around here.

Just me and Fazio had to slop around?

I won't answer, I'm a gentleman,

but anyway, fuck off!

What timing!

- Who is it? - Fazio.

Come in.

Sorry I'm late, I showered at home.

- Don't worry. Did you eat? - No, thanks.

So?

- Did you pick up the bag? - Want to hear this?

When we got back to the potter's field, it was pouring again,

the DA, Forensics, Pasquano were all there,

the bag Catarella saw was gone.

What a pain, that body! Where was it?

With the downpour, it had slid ten meters,

the bag was open and some pieces had come out.

What pieces?

Before he was put in the bag, he'd been cut into pieces.

Lots of pieces.

- His head too? - His head too.

Did you see his head?

Yes, but there was nothing to see,

his face was gone.

They'd hammered it to a pulp,

a bat, something heavy.

- They didn't want him identified. - Probably.

They cut his right first finger and burned his fingertip.

Know what that means?

Yes,

maybe he had a record

and could be identified by his fingerprints.

Does Pasquano know when he was killed?

Over two months ago, he'll know more after the autopsy.

- When is it? - Tomorrow morning.

- Not eating? - No, no way!

The second course is stew.

Last night, about 2, my wife started labor

so I rushed her to the hospital in Montelusa.

Coming into Vigata, my headlights caught a the back of a woman

walking in front of me.

Right then, a car came racing,

it passed me, swerved a little

and headed straight forthe woman.

She must have sensed danger from the engine noise,

she jumped and fell into the gutter.

The car stopped and then raced off.

- So, it didn't hit her. - No, the woman jumped aside.

I asked if she was hurt, she said no,

so I offered to take her into town.

She said where to stop and then got out,