Young Sheldon

With us tonight is Pastor Jeff Difford

from the First Baptist Church of Medford.

Thank you for being here, Pastor.

- My pleasure. - So it would appear

that your church's

Halloween Hell House has stirred up

quite a bit of controversy this year.

Oh, I wouldn't call it

controversy.

What would you call it?

A-As you know,

the purpose of a Hell House

is to demonstrate the wages of sin,

so as to lead people back to God.

That's wonderful.

But doesn't it concern you that a lot

of parents were alarmed

at the gruesome scenes you portrayed?

Once again, our intentions were pure.

Why don't we take a look at just how pure they were.

Let's roll the clip.

Oh, boy.

I need another beer.

Oh, darling, don't you think you've had enough?

I'll tell you when I had enough!

Whoa! Hey, cowboy,

why don't you put that down and call it a night.

Don't you tell me what to do.

That's enough, Peg.

Dear Lord.

As you can see, our last attempt at a Hell House

may have been a tad... traumatizing.

I thought it was a hoot.

Some of the little ones peed their pants.

But that wasn't the goal.

A nine-year-old crapped himself.

Why are you showing me this?

Well, Mary, this year, we'd like to go

with a more family-friendly production.

And I thought you'd be the perfect person to head that up.

Really? Me?

Yes, you. Absolutely.

Gosh, I don't know.

I always felt I had

a flair for the creative arts,

but putting on a big show like that...

You'll have a sizable budget and all the help you'll need

constructing sets, building props,

special effects, makeup.

Does sound tempting.

But, most importantly,

you'll have an opportunity to bring people to God

by vividly demonstrating the perils of sin.

Be careful if you touch on adultery.

Last year, one of the actors got pregnant.

Thanks, Peg.

So, what do you say?

I already know the first change I'm gonna make.

Instead of calling it "Hell House,"

which is a little off-putting,

I'm gonna call it...

"Heck House." Isn't that great?

That is great.

You don't really mean that.

Yes, I do.

Oh, I get it.

Happy wife, happy life.

You need to stop talking.

So it's not gonna be scary?

It will, but without all the blood and gore.

But I like blood and gore.

Hang on, y'all are trying to scare people

into joining the church?

Yeah. But people like

getting scared on Halloween anyway.

Why not make 'em jump in the right direction?

Actually, fear has been a recruiting tactic

used by organized religion

for centuries.

When you add guilt to keep people in line,

it's an extremely efficient form of crowd control.

Our religion is based on love, Sheldon, not fear.

So what happens when people don't follow the rules?

They burn in hell.

Because God loves 'em.

Episode Title : "Seven Deadly Sins and a Small Carl Sagan"

Sheldon.

Oh. Hi, Georgie.

Why was Veronica Duncan hugging you?

I'm tutoring her in trigonometry.

And that gets you hugs?

Thanks to me, she got her first C-minus.

Just between us, she's a little slow.

That's not what I heard.

What did you hear?

Is she secretly clever?

Because if she is, I completely missed it.

It doesn't matter.

You just need to introduce me to her.

Why?

I want to be her friend.

Well, you better take a number.

She's friends with a lot of boys around here.

Let me worry about that.

You just need to introduce us.

All right.

You know, she pays me two dollars for every one

of our tutoring lessons.

How much did it cost her to get a C-minus?

$26.

That's a good deal.

Now, remember, next week, we start our work

on Streetcar Named Desire.

So please prepare a monologue

for either Blanche or Stanley.

Usually, the girls do Blanche and the boys do Stanley,

but no judgment... You follow your heart.

Thank you again

for letting me come by to pick your brain.

Oh, please. Anything for the church.

Are you a religious man?

I'm an actor.

I'm whatever you need me to be.

All right.

As I told you on the phone,

I have been tasked

with mounting this year's Halloween production.

Oh, is that a haunted house kind of deal?

Yes, but with the goal of bringing people to God.

I do know something about that.

When I played Puck in Midsummer,

the Tulsa Herald called my performance heavenly.

Wow! Good for you.

Thank you, thank you.

Okay. Um, I was hoping

to put on a little play in each of the rooms

that portrays one of the seven deadly sins.

Pride, envy, gluttony, lust, sloth, wrath and greed!

Wow, you know your sins!

Well, again, I'm an actor.

They are the tools in my box.

Um, have you considered

a narrator, you know, um,

like, a tour guide kind of thing?

Oh, that's interesting.

But who would that be?

Well, I'd have to think the big man himself.

- God? - Satan.

Oh! That's spooky.

And he's trying to lure people toward sin.

Exactly.

That's a pretty big role.

I wonder who could do it.

Huh.

Well, it would have to be someone

with enough range to convey

sincerity and charm,

all the while, hiding a dark and corrupt soul!

Good golly.

If you were just a little taller, you'd be perfect.

I have lifts.

What are we doing here?

Waiting for Veronica.

How do you know she's in there?

It's kind of her homeroom.

Oh, hello again.

Oh.

Hey. What's up?

This is my brother Georgie. He wanted to meet you.

- Really? - Really.

I like your hair.

Uh, me, too.

What do you think?

Pretty great, huh?

Realtor's letting us use it for free.

Wow. How'd you swing that?

Well, I promised

Fred Murphy a lead role

in the lust room.

Ooh.

Look at you, just

wheeling and dealing

like a big-time Hollywood producer.

Maybe you're in the wrong business.

Being a mother?

- Being a Christian. - Ah.

- Greetings! - Ohhhh, good!

Mr. Lundy, you made it.

Oh, we're gonna be working together.

- You can call me Gene. - All right,

Gene, this is my mother, Connie.

- Hi - Connie. Hello.

Now, I would've bet she was your big sister.

I thought you said he was a good actor.

Oh, now.

So, what do you think?

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

- Spiderwebs. - What?

We're gonna need some spiderwebs and I think

maybe some fire effects on the left