Baywatch

THERE YOU ARE.

OKAY, TAKE IT AWAY.

-HEY, MY CLEVERNESS DOESN'T STOP WITH INVENTIONS,

I GOT ALL SORTS OF GREAT IDEAS

ON HOW TO DO JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING.

COME ON.

-WHY DON'T YOU GET REALLY CLEVER AND FAX YOUR LUNCH OVER.

-FAX SNACKS, I LIKE IT. IT'S GOT A NICE RING TO IT.

-WE THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA PANIC

IF YOU KNEW THAT THE ISLAND WAS GOING UNDER WATER.

-IT'S MY DUTY TO PROTECT YOU, AFTER ALL I'M THE

STRONG, SOLID MALE AND YOU'RE THE FRAIL HELPLESS FEMALE.

YES YOU BIG STRONG MAN YOU.

-EDDIE, WHEN I LEFT YOU AT HOME THIS MORNING

YOU WERE WATCHING GILLIGAN'S ISLAND,

AND NOW YOU'RE WATCHING IT HERE.

DON'T YOU THINK YOU'RE JUST A LITTLE BIT FIXATED?

-UH UH, IT'S A DIFFERENT EPISODE.

ON DIFFERENT CHANNELS ALL DAY LONG.

MOVE, YOU'RE BLOCKING MARY ANN!

-WE MUST GET ORGANIZED. HOW ARE WE GOING TO STAY AFLOAT?

-WHY DON'T WE BUILD AN ARK LIKE NOAH DID?

THAT'S A WONDERFUL IDEA.

WE'LL TAKE THE RAFT THE MEN STARTED TO BUILD

A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO AND WE'LL PUT A NEW HUT ON IT.

GOD, LOOK AT GINGER.

ALL THOSE YEARS ON THE SAME ISLAND WITH THE SAME DRESS

AND SHE STILL LOOKS FANTASTIC.

-HOW LONG HAVE THEY ALL BEEN SITTING THERE?

-TOO LONG, MUCH TOO LONG. THEIR EYES HAVE GLAZED OVER.

THANK YOU.

-HEY, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE IN UNIFORM PAL.

-YEAH, YEAH, YEAH NEXT COMMERCIAL.

-GARNER, I'M SURPRISED AT YOU WATCHING THIS.

-HEY LOOK, I JUST SAT DOWN TO TIME MY SHOE.

-YEAH OKAY, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE ALL STOP WATCHING GILLIGAN

AND DO WHAT WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING, HUH?

-COME ON, DON'T TOUCH THAT DIAL.

THIS IS MY FAVORITE EPISODE. IT'S THE ONE WHERE

THE PROFESSOR THINKS THE ISLAND IS SINKING SO HE DEVISES

THIS BRILLIANT SCHEME TO BUILD A BOAT AND THEN THEY SPLIT

JUST BEFORE THE TIDE GOES OUT. IT'S GREAT.

-DID I MISS A MEETING OR SOMETHING?

AH NO CAPTAIN, WE WERE JUST

CHECKING OUT THE STORM REPORT THERE.

-THE WEATHER STARTED GETTING ROUGH.

ALL I SEE IS SUNSHINE.

FIGURING OUT HOW TO SPEND ALL MY MILLIONS.

-OH COME ON, CAPTAIN, YOU'VE BEEN BUYING A LOTTERY TICKET

EVERY WEEK FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS.

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU'RE GONNA WIN THIS TIME?

PERSISTENCE PAYS OFF.

BESIDES, WOULD I HAVE ANY CHANCE IF I DIDN'T BUY A TICKET?

-THERE IS SOME LOGIC THERE CAPTAIN.

-WHAT'S THE JACKPOT UP TO NOW CAPTAIN?

70 MILLION DOLLARS.

THE LINES WERE AROUND THE BLOCK,

70 MILLION, AND IT'S ALL GONNA BE MINE.

MOVE OVER THURSTON HOWELL.

-FORGET GILLIGAN'S ISLAND WILL YOU?

WE GOT A WHOLE BEACH LOAD OF PEOPLE OUT THERE

WHO NEED TO BE RESCUED.

-29 MINUTES. MAN, YOU GUYS AT DOMINOS ARE UNBELIEVABLE.

YES, HERE YOU GO. KEEP THE CHANGE, MIKE. SEE YOU AROUND BUD.

-YOU GONNA EAT THAT ALL BY YOURSELF?

MAYBE.

GO AHEAD MAN, HELP YOURSELF.

-SO, GILLIGAN'S ISLAND WAS REALLY YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW?

-WAS? MAN IT STILL IS, ALWAYS WILL BE.

-EVERYBODY'S GO THEIR OWN TASTE I GUESS.

-I DON'T KNOW, GROWING UP AN ORPHAN NEVER HAVING A FAMILY

THOSE SEVEN PEOPLE ON THAT ISLAND

BECAME MY FAMILY GARNER,

THEY WERE ALWAYS THERE FOR ME. WHAT CAN I SAY?

GILLIGAN'S ISLAND?

YES, GILLIGAN'S ISLAND.

-YOU REALLY DID HAVE IT ROUGH DIDN'T YOU LITTLE BUDDY?

CHEAP SHOT MAN.

- THANKS, NEXT TIME GET SOME NAPKINS.

GOTTA GO. WHOA!

HEY, HEY, HEY WATCH YOURSELF.

THANKS.

HEY!

HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!

COME ON, BREAK IT UP WOULD YA?

GET A ROOM.

WHOA!

EDDIE, YOU OKAY?

YOU OKAY?

WHAT? YEAH.

I'M FINE, I'M A LITTLE EMBARRASSED.

I THOUGHT IT WAS LIFEGUARDS

WHO WERE SUPPOSED TO SAVE LIVES.

VERY FUNNY.

SURE YOU OKAY NOW?

YEAH, YEAH, I'M FINE.

THANKS.

-RESCUE ONE, THIS IS KMF 295, OVER.

THIS IS RESCUE ONE.

-MCCLAIN, WE'VE GOT A REPORT OF A WAVE RUNNER

OUT OFF THE OCEAN SIDE OF ANACAPA.

WHAT'S HE DOING THAT FAR OUT?

-GO PICK UP KRAMER AT TOWER 15 AND CHECK IT OUT, OVER.

WILL DO, OVER AND OUT.

STRAIGHT AHEAD, SEE IT?

YEAH.

-ALL RIGHT, NOW TRY AND PULL IT AS CLOSE AS YOU CAN.

HEY.

THANK GOD YOU GUYS SHOWED UP.

WHAT'S WRONG?

I DON'T KNOW, MY ENGINE DIED

AND I JUST CAN'T SEEM TO GET IT TO KICK OVER.

-LET ME GIVE YOU A HAND. SEE WHAT I CAN DO.

WHY DON'T YOU SLIDE UP A LITTLE BIT.

I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO DO THIS?

THIS WAY SEEMS FINE.

PUT THIS BACK IN THERE.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE SOMETHING HERE.

WHY DON'T YOU PUSH THIS BUTTON HERE,

GIVE IT A LITTLE GAS AT THE SAME TIME, READY?

OH HEY, THERE WE GO.

YOU KNOW WHAT IT WAS? THE KILL SWITCH WAS STUCK.

ALL RIGHT, YOU WANNA RIDE BACK WITH US?

UM, NO I DON'T THINK SO.

THANKS FOR THE START THOUGH.

NO PROBLEM.

GIVE ME A HAND?

HAVE A GOOD ONE.

WHAT?

CRANK IT UP AND LET'S GET GOING.

COME ON.

-IT WON'T START. I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S THE MATTER.

HUH.

WHY DON'T YOU RADIO FOR HELP?

-RESCUE ONE TO BAYWATCH, REPEAT RESCUE ONE TO BAYWATCH.

RADIO'S DEAD.

IT'S THE ELECTRICAL SYSTEM.

WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

-THERE'S NOT MUCH WE CAN DO. WE JUST, I DON'T KNOW.

THERE'S ANACAPA ISLAND, WE'LL DRIFT TO THE SHORE

AND WAIT FOR SOMEONE TO MISS US.

GREAT.

-YOU KNOW, THERE IS A BRIGHT SIDE TO THIS.

THERE IS.

COME ON, IT'S ROMANTIC, THINK ABOUT IT.

IT'S JUST YOU, ME, THE MOON, HUH?

-WELL ARE YOU SURE YOU WOULDN'T RATHER BE

STUCK ON THE ISLAND WITH THE GIRL ON THE WAVE RUNNER?

I WAS JUST DOING MY JOB.

A LITTLE TOO WELL.

COME ON, LIGHTEN UP.

YOU LIGHTEN UP.

WELL...

IF YOU WANT YOU CAN START A SIGNAL FIRE

AND I'LL LOOK FOR FOOD, OR I CAN START A FIRE

AND YOU CAN GO LOOK FOR FOOD.

-I'LL START THE FIRE AND YOU LOOK FOR THE FOOD.

THOUGHT YOU'D SAY THAT.

HEY!

WHOA, UH OH.

GILLIGAN?

WAIT! WAIT, GILLIGAN!

GILLIGAN! HEY!

HEY, GILLIGAN!

HEY, WAIT UP.

HEY GILLIGAN!

HEY, COME ON I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN.

WHERE'D THAT COME FROM?

WHOA!

-GILLIGAN, MAN IT REALLY IS YOU.

IT'S ME ALL RIGHT.

WHOA!

YOU'RE HANGING OFF A CLIFF.

NOT FOR LONG.

WHOA, HELP.

AM I GLAD TO SEE YOU.

-WELL I'M KINDA GLAD TO SEE YOU TOO,

WHOEVER YOU ARE.

I'M EDDIE.

I'M ON THE ISLAND WITH SHAUNI.

AND--

LOOK OUT!

HELP! HELP!