Rick and Morty

Aah, aah!

Oh, my God.

Holy shit Oh.

What are -- What are these things?!

Do I look like I know?

Last thing I remember, I was, ugh, in a cave

looking at some wet egg and -- Oh, that probably did it.

I told you not to look at that egg!

I-It was too wet.

You don't get to tell me what to look at.

I've seen your Pornhub account.

Also, who makes a Pornhub account?

The algorithm learns your preferences better that way.

Plus if you get in kind of a cool enough relationship,

you can sort of follow each other

and check out each other's kinks, you know?

Alright, God damn, sold.

How do we get out of here? Morty, relax.

They're face-hugging parasites.

I don't think their society's gonna be that hard to navigate.

Okay, yeah, this might be a little harder than I thought.

Holy shit They've got an M&M's store.

This is bad, Rick. Th-Th-Th-Th-This is really bad.

Just be cool, Morty.

All we gotta do is blend in, find our ship,

and get the fuck outta here.

Alright, Morty, here's the plan, put this back on your face.

I-I'm not putting that back on my face! Relax. It's dead.

Okay, now it's dead.

Come on, hurry up.

Rick, i-it's bleeding.

I-It's bleeding acid.

Alright, well, that should be the last of it.

If not, then just gimme two tugs on the arm.

Seems like a self-destructive life cycle.

Is that gonna happen to us?

You feel an egg in your stomach?

-No. -Well, glass half full.

How's it going? 'Sup.

-Glory to Glorzo. -Totally.

Love Glorzo.

Glorzo is peace.

Peace is Glorzo.

Wow, just cogs in the machine, y'know?

Ma-Makes you think -- Yeah, I'm sure you'll make this

into a beautiful short film that your parents'll pay for,

Morty, but right now, we really just need to find my ship.

You sure you're not just jealous?

Looks like I'm kind of a celebrity around here.

The future is Glorzo!

Oh, my God. I was just reading you.

Congratulations on making it into print media.

Real bright future there.

Honestly, it's shocking to see the two of you together.

Because we're both geniuses?

No, because I've seen your videos,

and you make me fuckin' sick.

Fix him.

Glory to Glorzo.

Sir, you shouldn't wander off like that.

We've been looking all over for you.

The project is ready for your approval.

Sir, is this man bothering you?

Um, no, h-he's fine.

Uh, what -- what project?

Jesus Christ, who the fuck was I?

Here's a scientific fact I'm not allowed to say --

Our hosts are biologically designed to incubate our eggs.

If that "triggers" you, fuck off.

If it doesn't, please like and subscribe.

New videos every Glorzday.

God, was I at least rich?

I mean, d-d-did I at least sell out

and sell vitamins or something?

Rick, I've watched enough Pornhub to know

what a studio apartment looks like.

God damn.

Jesus, your Glorzo got shit done.

My lord, we await your command.

Oh, to...

shoot it? A-At people?

Glorzo is peace.

All shall be made Glorzo.

Glory to Glorzo.

I...did this?

You and the amazing technology you both brought us.

Yeah, makes sense.

A-And where was this heading?

Earth? Probably Earth?

The humans call it "Earth."

Yeah, well, okay, first of all, great work.

You guys obviously put a lot of work into this.

Okay. And y'know, it shows.

I-It really shows. But um...

I-I've been thinking, and, you know,

maybe we should just call this off.

Sorry, is -- is there more?

Nope, nope.

I-I guess, uh, that -- that's it.

Just don't Glorzo Earth.

Just would've been nice to have heard this sooner

before we spent all day on it.

Yeah, well, I-I'm just hearing about it, too.

You ordered it. Right.

I-I did, and, um...

I'm just saying for next time, maybe put more thought

into it before a whole day of --

Okay, well, I'm sorry I made you do your job for a fucking day!

You look like you were all really busy

before I came and fuck it all up.

Boy, oh boy, huh? This guy's a genius, but at --

but at what price, you know?

Y'know, fuck you, Rick!

Who's...Rick?

Yeah, well, if we're free to ask questions,

why haven't you blinked, uh, for 20 minutes,

and why, uh, doesn't your mouth move when you talk?

Ah, geez, look at me.

I-I feel down on -- on -- on the floor.

Oh, let -- let me, uh, help -- help you out here, buddy.

Ah, thanks, man. Thanks, pal. That's right.

I'm right back where -- where -- right back in the saddle here.

Alright, fuck it, run.

I-I hate this! I hate all of this!

Yeah, yeah, keep that feedback coming, Morty.

It can only help.

Oh, shit Aw, man!

How big is this city?!

I know, it's like pick a lane.

Are you face huggers or industrialists?

Damn, feels kinda good when there's no guilt, huh?

Yeah, it's -- it's like in "Star Wars."

Yeah, just like in "Star Wars."

Go nuts!

Nice, Morty! Give a little "yee-haw" if you want.

They -- They always do a little "yee-haw" like a cowboy.

Yee-- Yee-ha-- Yee-haw.

Good enough.

God, I needed this.

Honestly, it's been a while since I've been able

to just let loose, you know?

Just have fun. I'm -- I'm --

I'm sorry if I've been taking it out on you.

No, I get it. You got a lot on your plate, amigo.

I-I just wish you'd open up

to me more about it sometimes, you know?

I-I-I'm your partner. Thanks, Morty.

I mean that. Thank you.

Sometimes, I get a little in my head, you know?

Hey, man, that head's a good place to be.

Just remember to let me in sometimes, you know?

Will do, buddy. Mothefucker

Oh, my God, this is so much fun!

I don't want to stop!

Yeah, it's like popping bubble wrap.

Honestly, I'm proud of us for not.

Totally. It would've been cheap.

Yeah, real low-hanging fruit, and we're batter than that.

Pearl Harbor, on the other hand...

Yeah, I think that's in-bounds.

I am the god of death!

Should've been a better species!

So, you did a 9/11?

Almost did a 9/11.

We -- We went with a Pearl Harbor.

We're pretty classy.

Why were either of those an option?

Ask the Saudis.

Wow. Damn.

Yeah, getting political.

I'm political now. How 'bout you, Jerry?

You got anything to add to the family dynamic?

I've been getting into beekeeping lately.

Is something wrong with that?

What's wrong with that?

Don't I have the right to be happy? To exist?

I'm sorry I didn't 9/11

Pearl Harbor before breakfast, but I have a life, too!

I have dreams! And how's Summer?

Did she have fun, too?

Oh. Uh-um.

Summer... was...

With us.

There.

You saw us take her in the car with us.

Mm, yes. Yes, yes, of course.

Th-That's what happened.

And now she's... Sleepy.

Um, she's -- she's sleepy.

Really sleepy. That's why she's not here.

So sleepy.

She's sleepy?!

What the hell was that?!

I didn't see you trying anything!

Shitting the bed isn't better than not shitting the bed!

Where's Summer?!

Geez. Oh, man.

You know, maybe we went too hardcore on these guys.

Yeah, why do you think we never go back

to a place we've already been?