The Boondocks

You're ready, son?

Ready as I'm gonna be, I guess.

Just believe in the music, son.

Ladies and gents, we got a real special treat

for y'all tonight.

Let's give a big ol' Shitkickers' welcome

to Jimmy Rebel!

How y'all doin'?

How y'all doin'?

How are you?

My name's Jimmy Rebel.

This first number's a song I wrote.

It's very near and dear to me,

and it's about niggers.

A-one, a-two, a-one, two, three.

Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow!

Ruckus, look.

Woo, baby! Wow!

Come on, hurry up, look!

Ruckus. Jigaboo-woo-woo!

Ruckus! What? W-What? What?

What are you listening to? Only the greatest country,

western and racist singer to ever breathe into a microphone.

Mr. Jimmy Rebel.

Go on, listen. Listen.

What did he just say? Oh, my God.

Uh-huh. See that, that's nice, ain't it?

That son of a bitch. Get this bullshit outta here.

That's just sick. What you sayin', Robert?

His music is responsible

for the man you see before you today.

He inspired my love for racist music.

You know, sometimes I write my own racist song.

I think they pretty good too.

Well, keep 'em to yourself. Nobody wanna hear that shit.

Oh, yeah? Well, just 'cause you said that,

I'm gonna go home and record 'em.

So there. Fine, then get the fuck on.

I will! Fine! Fine! Fine!

Soon as we finish this game.

I think it's your move.

Dear Mr. Jimmy Rebel,

I hope this letter finds you

in good health and spirits.

My name is Uncle Ruckus, no relation,

and I am first and foremost a lover of beautiful music.

I proudly play your music

while at work at one of my many, many jobs.

It always elicits a response.

Shut off that goddamn shit, you fat racist fuck!

Please, find enclosed the song:

"Keep Them Niggas Outta NASCAR."

It was inspired by all of the niggas

I hope we can keep outta NASCAR.

Good morning, Mr. White Man, sir. How can I-- Oh!

Excuse me, I'm, uh, lookin' for

the residence of Mr. Uncle Ruckus.

Y-You lookin'-- You said you lookin'

f-for, uh-- For Uncle-- You know him?

Well, thank God. I been driving around forever.

Well, this, uh-- This is the place.

Oh, well, is Mr. Ruckus home?

He's not expecting me, this is kind of a surprise.

My name is Jimmy Rebel.

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!

I am your biggest fan. I can't believe it.

Well, I can't believe it either.

I never met a black who liked my music.

Oh, wait. Oh, my God.

You're not-- No, you can't be--

No, no, no, sir. No, sir.

I am not Uncle Ruckus, sir.

Oh, whew.

I was gonna say, man...

Yeah, yeah, that-- That would be crazy, wouldn't it?

That'd be weird. Yeah, well, no, sir.

No, sir, uh-- My name is, uh-- My name is Toby.

I'm Mr. Ruckus's loyal manservant.

No, sir, Uncle Ruckus is a true blue,

red-blooded, American white man.

Well, if Mr. Ruckus isn't too busy, I'd like to speak to him.

Now, I know that Uncle Ruckus would really love

to speak with you Mr. Jimmy Rebel, sir, but, uh--

Well, he's not here.

Oh. Well, this was the return address on the tape he sent up.

Oh, no. See, Uncle Ruckus he don't live here.

This-- This here my place.

No, sir, Mr. Ruckus he got him a proper white folks house.

Uh, we just use this here address, you know,

for the death threats and the mail bombs. Stuff like that.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I know all about that stuff.

Well, listen, if you wouldn't mind giving me his address

or maybe just call him, and, uh,

see if it's all right if I stop by?

Oh, yes, sir, I-I would do that, sir, but, uh--

Well, unfortunately, uh--

Uh, Mr. Uncle Ruckus, you see he is-- He's very, very sick.

He caught the, uh,

the Nigerian Monkeypox. Very contagious.

As if they Internet scams

and underwear bombs wasn't bad enough.

Goddamn Nigerians.

Mm. Well, that is just tragic.

I do know that Mr. Ruckus, he be very mad at me

if I didn't offer you a cold drink after coming all this way.

Thank you, Toby, but, uh--

Well, it's gettin' late.

Uh, M-Mr. Rebel, sir?

Yes, Toby? I just wanted to say, sir,

that a lot of people can talk bad about darkies,

but you make art that talks bad about darkies.

Well, hell, Toby.

Oh, why don't you go ahead and fix me that drink?

Yes, sir, Mr. Rebel, sir.

Oh, by the way, have you ever heard of revitaligo?

Oh, Mr. Rebel.

You know, all these years I been singing about niggers,

I probably only done had a conversation

with five of 'em at the most. Heh-heh-heh.

Are there any others like you?

Oh, absolutely not. No, sir.

There ain't one good nigger ever stepped foot on this Earth,

except maybe Alan Keyes or that nigga that shot Malcolm X.

You are a funny guy.

Well, I should be gettin' back to the hotel.

Hey, I'll leave you my number.

Maybe he'll be feeling better tomorrow.

Uh, well, we'll see. We'll see.

But you should come by anyway, I, uh...

I'd be happy to show you around the town.

Oh, sure thing, Toby.

You got my number.

Ruckus?

Ruckus. Ruckus!

Robert, have you ever met somebody

who seem to like you but it's only because

they don't know the real you?

Yeah, that's pretty much every woman I've ever dated.

So you met someone, huh?

Oh, yes. Yes I did, Robert.

Somebody very special, but I don't know if--

If it's all a lie, how far can it go?

Well, how big is the lie?

Well, uh, I'm supposed to be a white man.

Without revitaligo.

You know what, Robert? Fuck you and everybody

who live in your household. Okay, whitey.

Good mornin', Mr. Rebel.