Demonic Toys

I win. I win war.

I win. I win.

War.

And that's where it always ends.

That's a pretty weird dream, Jud.

I see all sorts of frying possibilities there.

Probably some sort of sexual thing, you know?

You know, I knew we should have never moved in together.

You don't take me seriously anymore.

We were right to move in together.

And now that you mentioned it, maybe we should, get married.

Look, I got nothing against marriage, it's just, you know,

we should get married when we're ready to have kids, you know.

Do you want kids?

I mean, 'cause we never really talked about it or anything.

Yeah, sure, someday, you know.

Shit.

Where are they?

Relax, they'll be here.

I've been through this a million times.

You'll get used to it.

They always like to come late, keep the other guy waiting.

You know, Matt.

Sometimes you don't pick up on things right away.

Hey, it'll be okay.

This would be a piece of cake.

Like now, for instance, I'm trying to tell you something.

What?

I asked you how you feel about having a kid for a reason.

Are you pregnant?

I found out this morning.

Well, that's great.

I'm going to be a dad.

Why didn't you tell me this before?

You shouldn't be here tonight.

Oh shit, here they are.

Look, you stay in the car, let me take care of this.

Oh, don't be stupid, Matt.

You got your piece?

Yeah, but I just think it'd be better if you...

Then let's dance.

Cable. Miss me?

Oh, yeah, I like you with a fire that burns.

He's been my loins.

Me too.

It must be love.

Who's the femme?

That's my investor.

I'll take a bite.

Fuck you.

Meow.

Are you going to show us something?

Are you going to stand here and jerk us off all night?

Hey, Hesse, I love this guy, I really do.

Yeah, I'm going to show you something.

Come on.

Knock off some Indonesia, the good stuff.

Single action.

You mean just for rear sight?

The one at stock and best of all, no serial numbers.

Clean as a whistle or a baby's bottom.

Knock it off, Lincoln.

Whatever floats your boat.

We got these babies out of Russia.

Sell a lot to the cartels.

Bang-bang, Juno.

Hey.

No clip, man.

All right.

How much?

40 K for the whole lot.

What do you say?

I say, you're under arrest.

Matt. Matt.

Oh, shit. Oh, baby, no.

No.

Oh, god. You bastards.

God damn you.

My god, I'm hit.

Lincoln, Lincoln.

Lincoln.

Lincoln, I'm hit.

Lincoln!

Sorry, Guy.

Lincoln, help me.

Now you have almost enough.

Well that would be Charnetski.

How do you know?

He always orders at this time.

Let me have it.

Thanks for calling Country Chicken, the best chicken

in town, your order please?

Get off the phone hammerhead and let me talk to Mark.

It's for you.

What's up, Charnetski?

The regular.

Legs and breast and none of that wing shit.

And bring me plenty of honey for my fucking movies time.

You assholes always skip on that.

Would you like that extra crispy or chunk style?

Take a guess.

The chunk style.

That's my boy.

Now, get off your fucking ass and bring me my food.

You got it.

Mr. Wayne.

Mr. Wayne.

Is that cigarette in your mouth?

No. It's your dick.

out please, this instant.

I don't think I like your attitude, mister.

Well, I guess that makes two of us.

You're being verbally abusive to me, Mr. Peterson.

Where do you think you're going?

I'm going to deliver Charnetski his food.

Fuck you about your attitude, it is not acceptable.

Now, I want you to make sure you come right

out back here, mister.

Well, maybe I won't come back.

Maybe I'll just fly your fucking chicken mobile into the river.

How do you like that?

No, man, what is wrong?

Fucking toys.

You're under arrest asshole.

So you're cops, huh?

Well, I guess I know that your partner,

going out there, didn't I?

Shut up.

It's okay.

It's okay 'cause I'm going to be out on bail

by the end of the night bitch.

This whole fucking thing is entrapment.

Hi Guy.

Thanks for coming.

I've been sleeping for a long time.

Waiting for someone just like you to wake me.

We're going to have a lot of fun here tonight, friend.

We're going to raise hell.

What the fuck was that?

And your partner?

How the fuck should I know, Miss Cop?

Shit!

Shit!

What's going on, lady?

We're locked in.

What! Fucking brilliant!

Fucking brilliant lady, what are we going to do now?

We wait until morning.

Wait? No, no, no, fuck that police lady,

you get me the fuck out of here now!

Now! 'Cause I got my rights, lady!

You got to take me in the county.

I got to make a phone call.

I got to talk to my fucking lawyer!

You don't get shit, you killed my partner.

You're lucky I don't put a bullet in your fucking head

and call it self-defense.

Is that you, kid?

No, it's the Hillside Strangler, let me in.

Hold your pants on.

Hey! Hey you, up here!

Hey you, up here!

Hey! Hey!

Hey, up here!

You're a fucking genius, lady, a lot of good that did.

Now, there you are, it took you long enough.

Yeah, it took me the same amount

of time it takes me every night.

Here you go, twelve o'clock, right on the dot.

You want a beer, kid?

Take a guess.

Thanks.

Hey, did you see Miss July?

Not yet.

Wrap your eyeballs around them.

Ooh wow!

It sort of brings a tear to your eye, though.

Yeah and something else.

You God damn, I need them, son of a bitches!

Look kid, how is work?

Ugh. It's a fucking a joke, chunking chicken Christ.

Peterson runs around like he's got a board shoved

up his ass all the time.

Well, what do I tell you?

The world is your twin and all the people in it are assholes.

God damn economy.

Here's what you do.

You can do like I do.

Find yourself a niche.

Break yourself in.

Take my gun.

I mean I sit on my ass, watch television.

Take a little hair off your pooch.

That's a life.

Take this iguana guy for instance...

Iguana?

Yeah, this guy who's down the Costa Rica.

Starts raising the little bastards.

Once you take up the space.

And it tastes just like chicken.