When Zachary Beaver Came to Town

Do you know what would be cool?

What?

Climb all the way to the top

and cross the catwalk.

I could do it.

Then do it.

I dare ya.

Ahh!

Get Wayne!

I'm gonna die.

My mom's gonna kill me if I die.

You're not gonna die.

I'll get ya down.

How?

-What were you doing, climbin' up here?

Cal dared me.

I did not!

I told him he was too little.

I'm not too little!

Catwalk broke.

-You do whatever my little brother says?

Here, just grab on.

There you go.

There... okay.

All right.

Ahh!

I got ya. There we go.

All right, Wayne!

You gotta be smarter now that I'm leavin'.

When are ya comin' back?

They don't tell ya.

Come on, I'll buy ya a snow cone.

Even though Wayne is technically Cal's brother,

he's totally like a big brother to me.

So starting here on the silo makes sense.

See, that day was not only

the first time he was leaving,

but also the last time anything in my life

was ever normal.

Stay close.

-Up till then, every day was fun,

and trouble was never anything Wayne

and a snow cone couldn't fix.

-But Wayne had to go join the army,

and as the summer went on,

I realized that was only the beginning.

-Mom, where did you get those pants?

I ordered them online.

They look killer, don't they?

They look uncomfortable.

-Comfort and lookin' good aren't exactly

two peas in a pod, honey.

But I feel good...

which is why I'm gonna win the

"Hearts of Country Music Television."

-Mom actually works as a waitress,

but her dream is to be a singer.

...like a Dixie Chick, or Shania Twain.

What is it now?

-Don't worry, I've about got it.

I can not miss my flight.

I got it, honey.

-My dad works as a mailman, but he really likes worms.

I'm serious-- he raises worms for fertilizer and fish bait.

I got somethin' for you.

Oh, no.

-It's to keep your throat warm before you sing.

-So, anyway, 12 years ago they got together and made me.

-Thanks. Be careful with it.

I don't need engine grease on my neck.

Toby, come and hug me.

Ohh... goodbye, baby.

You and your dad and these glasses.

You'll look better in contacts.

You think so?

I know so.

-Be back by four. Give that worm a squirt, okay?

I love you.

-I love you, too. Don't be scared.

I knew I'd miss my mom.

But I'd no idea of the trouble headed my way...

... and no idea, that rolling into town,

was the last person I'd ever expect to change my life.

Toby!

Toby!

I'm in the worm shed.

Didn't you hear?

Hear what?

Come on, quick.

Wo-Honey, honey, look.

Come on!

Wait up!

Look.

-You're not going in there, are you?

Hi, Kate.

Of course, we are.

What are you going to do, stand there

and take stupid pictures?

-Has your mom left for Nashville yet?

She's on her way.

-If she wins, she's gonna get to make a record, right?

Yeah, that's what they say.

Nice talkin' to you guys, too.

Ooh, Scarlet.

Toby, dude, she wants you.

-Hey, Toby. Would y'all do me a favor?

Sure.

-Take Tara in for me. I gotta get home.

Mom's out so Juan's droppin' by.

-It's show time, folks. Welcome, fellow Texans.

Your lovely town may be too remote for

the circus to visit, but not for us.

My name is Paulie Rankin, known in the business

as The Wizard.

It's time now to enter the domain

of Zachary Beaver, possible the fattest boy in the world.

Four-hundred and forty-three pounds.

Now, you don't have to rush, but no dawdling, please.

In the tradition, I'll be happy to take your questions.

And your money.

Oh, by the way, could you lend me the five bucks?

Add it to your tab.

Ha, ha, ha.

-Is that another letter from Wayne?

Oh, yeah. Here.

Let's see.

-Its so weird-- he can't email when he's on a mission.

Ever write him back yet?

No, not yet.

-Man, do you think Intelligence checked this

to see what he wrote?

-Intelligence? It doesn't matter.

I mean, he sails halfway around the world

and then he writes back about

'excitement central' here

like it's the greatest place on earth.

-Whew! Makes you think, don't it?

-It certainly does. It certainly does.

Here, and her.

Mm-hey--

Sh-- She doesn't gotta go to the bathroom, does she?

Do you?

Okay.

She better not, or else.

How much do you eat?

As much as I can.

How old are you?

Old enough.

Where do you go to school?

You're looking at it.

What's in this gold box?

Do I smell pee?

Gee!

Did that kid just pee in here?

Get her out of here.

Here, home. Go change.

He was so fat!

-Hey, man, I didn't know you babysat.

Oh, my God.

-Come on, your mom never lets me cook.

I'm goin' all out while I can.

Where's the-- Oh.

This came for you.

What's this?

I think it's the...

contact lenses your mother ordered for you.

Hungry? It's Manwich flambe.

-One more. -Give it a rest.

One more, come on.

-No. -Stupid loser.

-Just come out here and have a smoke, for Christ's sake.

Can I just come out here--

-One more. -No more.

Forget it. No more Boggle.

-Well, what else do you wanna play?

Paulie, come on.

Hey, Paulie! Come back! Come on!

Paulie.

-You won't be able to get your license

if you can't learn to park.

Oh, be quiet!

-AH! OH! She hit me.

I'm hit.

Cal. Cal.

You boys come here a minute?

-You know, ladybugs are comin' in a few days

and we're gonna need some help,

with Wayne gone-- from both of you. All right?

Sure, mom.

-We need 'em for the cotton crop.

They're nature's pesticide.

Kate!

-Why don't you boys give her some space?

Go away... now.

What do you want to do?

-I don't know. What do you want to do?

-I don't know. There's nothing to do.

-You think he's still there?

I mean, you know, the fat kid?

Na, it's too hot. He'd melt.