The Adventures of Puss in Boots

- -El Gato!

"In fond memory of Dulcinea,

beloved member of our community."

"Rest in peace, Toby. We will miss you."

I'll miss me too.

Hmm.

There is something very wrong here.

I'll say. Look at this guy and his dumb beard.

And what kind of crazy name is Artephius?

No, I mean my headstone. "Puss in Boots, great guy.

Did some neat stuff."

"Did some neat stuff"?

This is no sufficient epitaph for a hero such as myself.

Actually, it says "Pus in Boots."

What?

Ugh. A disgusting word.

This must be corrected posthaste!

Don't you think we should be more concerned

with the fact that we have graves?

Yes, this is also troubling.

Is it not, Babieca?

Although he cannot make words anymore, he agrees.

Wait, if we have graves,

maybe we're g-g-g-ghosts!

Do not be ridiculous, Toby.

I have never been a ghost before, and I am not going to start now.

Maybe we should see if someone can explain what happened.

An excellent suggestion.

We go!

I know it's early,

but doesn't the town seem kind of... empty?

Mm-hmm. Something is amiss.

Look at how my whiskers are sticking straight out.

That is a sign of danger.

You-- You're-- You're alive.

You're all alive!

- -Oh!

Is it weird that she hugged the horse first?

Ooh!

-Oh! -

Aah!

When you didn't come back, we assumed you'd died.

We had funerals.

I played the bagpipes.

Nuh-uh, we weren't dead. We were in the Netherworld,

where we joined up with a wizard and the Zephelim

to defeat the Blind King, who turned out to be Evil Puss,

so that the Tiny Queen could rule once more!

Mm-hmm, but did you hear what I just said? I played the bagpipes.

Hmph. I feel like you should be more impressed.

But why did you have funerals?

We have only been gone a day or so.

Are you mad?

You've been gone just over a year now.

- -Wait.

Didn't someone say time worked different in the Netherworld?

No.

Why, does it?

Yeah. It was that Artephius guy.

Or he would have said it if he hadn't been slacking off.

Shirker.

Pajuna, where is everybody?

You don't know?

They're all gone.

-Where? -I don't know.

Scattered to the wind, I imagine.

And you'd better go too.

Go on. Scoot! Shoo!

They won't like you being here.

-Who won't? - Us!

Us won't.

Ha!

A few thieves?

This is not a problem.

No, Puss. Hundreds of thieves.

San Lorenzo is a thief town now!

Never! I will now demonstrate to them

that this is still very much a cat-human-pig-goblin-cow town.

Also, skeletons.

- -Pablo, remember me?

The name is Raul, and, no, I do not.

You have forgotten me?

Then let me jog your memory.

Oy!

Ha-ha!

Ha!

Oh, right.

Now I remember.

Puss in Boots. Right?

Puss in Boots?

The former protector of San Lorenzo?

They say he did some neat stuff.

Fiends, allow me to show you what sort of neat stuff I did.

- -Hyah!

Fine. You have won the first round.

Apparently I'm fatigued by all the inter-wordly travel.

How about you let me go and we just say best two out of three?

Um, we have to ask the boss.

Um, I am sorry. The boss?

This guy?

Well, well, well.

Puss in the Boots.

I thought you were dead.

And I do hate to be wrong.

You think you can just steal San Lorenzo?

I already have, Puss in the Boots.

And it's not San Lorenzo anymore.

It's The Fortress of El Moco.

What? It is not a fortress.

No, but it will be after I blow up the town

and build a fortress in its place!

I'm getting one last shipment of explosives tomorrow,

and that should be enough.

Then, boom, no more town!

This I will not allow.

-Oh, really? -Yes.

Really, very, really.

I am the sworn protector of San Lorenzo,

and that means that I must get rid of you

and bring back the San Lorenzans.

You're going to find that very difficult -when you have no arms or legs! -

I enjoy a challenge.

Whoo!

Ha! Toby! Artephius!

-Yah! -Yah!

I will make San Lorenzo as it once was!

So swears Puss in Boots!

I cannot believe I left San Lorenzo unguarded for a year.

And now it is on the verge of being destroyed.

I have failed everyone.

Don't be silly, Puss.

You haven't failed anyone.

You saved the Netherworld, and you blocked the portal.

That's some neat stuff.

- -Sorry, too soon.

I could have protected them.

I should have protected them. And I still can!

I will find every single child, woman, skeleton,

man, horse, goblin, and, uh, whatever Kid Pickles is.

He's human.

Agree to disagree.

I will find them all, bring them back here,

and we will get rid of the thieves, together!

Then everything will be just exactly the way it was.

But... what if they don't want to come back?

It's been a year.

They might be happy where they are.

They cannot be happy where they are.

They can only be happy in San Lorenzo.

Because that is where... eh... that is where they belong.

Maybe you think they can only be happy in San Lorenzo

because that's where you were happy.

What? Nonsense.

I am a loner, a nomad, a free spirit!

Uh-huh. You say that a lot.

I will save San Lorenzo from being destroyed

and make it as it once was.

But how are we going to find everyone?

Hey! Maybe we can use this to find 'em.

The dowsing rod. Where did you get it?

My robe.

Uh, but I thought it was broken.

Yeah, I fixed it a while back.

Hey, rod, we're looking for the lost San Lorenzans.

Where's the nearest one?

Someone is still there!

Give me that!

Hear me, rod!

Where is the nearest one who is not Pajuna?

Someone is still there!

Duh. Artephius just said that.

Oh!

Of course.

Someone has taken refuge in the Mole Kingdom.

I wonder who could be down here.

The mayor? Kid Pickles? He may be part mole. It is hard to say.

- -