Robot Chicken

_

It's alive!

It's hard to find a great-tasting breakfast

that won't raise my cholesterol.

Did somebody ask for a tasty breakfast?!

- Wow! - Ohh!

Nothing beats the taste of oats and honey!

It's gr-r-r-r-r-eat!

- What the ... - Aah!

No! No! Oh, my God, no! This can't be happening!

It'll be okay, bee. You'll be okay.

Yeah, yeah. I'll be okay. I'll just...

- Whoa! Ohh! - Ohh!

- Oh, man! - It's so cold.

Oh, my heart ... I can feel it slowing down.

Oh. Oh, it stopped. I'm ... I'm so scared.

Honey Nut Cheerios has oats that'll help lower cholesterol ...

part of this nutritious breakfast.

Mmm! Mmm!

- Ohh. - Ohh. Sorry, babe.

Damn. That is creepy.

The way our neighbor's ex-wife spies on us every day?

No. I mean, that ... that freakin' thing!

Don't mind me. Ah-la-la-la-la!

Adam can't defeat Count Marzo, but He-Man can.

And maybe He-Man can ... can do it himself this time?

Oh, Cringer, always so afraid.

By the power of Grayskull!

I never consented to this. I'm literally pissing myself!

- Is this what you wanted? Is it?! - I have the power!

And I have no power!

What kind of hero forces his best friend

into violent adventures without permission?!

Oh, great.

Now I'm shitting myself in addition to the piss.

- Ha ha! - No!

Oh, don't point that sword at me! No!

Feeling better, Battle Cat?

Yes, of course I do! I'm Battle Cat now!

I'm standing in a pool of piss, shit, and vomit,

but otherwise great.

Today we're going to be learning about the geology of mountains!

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

- Goin' down! - Oh, my God!

Aaaaaah!

A mountain! Ohh!

Stay calm, children.

This... is... a learning experience.

I knew I should have stayed home today and cut myself.

We're stuck in the mountains!

What are we gonna do, you dried-up hippie?!

There's only one thing we can do ... cannibalism!

What?!

Whoever picks the shortest straw will get eaten.

- Eat this, you psycho! - Don't be silly, Ralphie.

Your penis wouldn't feed a fly.

In fact, the buttocks are the most nutritious.

Thanks for the tip.

Miss Frizzle takes just like chicken!

I just remembered ... we all brought food!

Ew! Bologna?!

Now, that's what I call eating ass.

And that sucker was flying all over the place.

- Now, stop me if you've heard this. - I will, 'cause I've heard

every one of your Quidditch stories, Harry.

It was zigging around. Oh, those things can move, man!

And I was the best seeker ever to play the game.

Bartender, Accio another round!

Jesus! That's enough butterbeer for one night, all right?

Oh, my God, Ginny. I didn't realize you were here.

Didn't realize I was having a beer with my wife, Ginny.

Come on, Harry...

I love your new snakeskin jacket, Ginny.

Agh! Hogwarts!

Best years of my life, man.

Now my freakin' kid's there, having all the fun,

while I get stuck with the tuition bill.

Do you know what, mate? I'm done.

This conversation died at exactly 19 minutes past 9:00 tonight.

Oh, you don't like talking to me?

Well, good luck finding another wizard who can speak parseltongue.

I can talk to other snakes, you narcissist.

Me, too! I'm gonna go find the other snakes

and tell them what a butthole you are.

Dude, you are in no condition to fly.

Oh, is that you, Mum? Oh, no, it can't be my mum.

My mum is dead! Heigh-ho, Firebolt!

Aaaah! Ugh! Ugh! Aaah!

Iceberg, dead ahead!

Hard astern! This is the end, lads.

- Save the women and children. - Belay that order, captain.

Who dares?!

There's only one order that matters here ... ride or die!

Jesus Christ!

Oh, it's all about family.

- Mr. Toretto, you've saved the Titanic. - My work here is done.

Here are two tickets to the premiere of my new "xXx" movie.

Uh, no, thank you.

Oh, being naughty is the best!

We are the bad kids!

Ew! Are you in costume, or do you really look like that?

I have been sent to help especially rude and naughty children.