King of the Hill

Previously on King of the Hill.

Go!

You wanna jump or not?

You got my check. What do you care?

I know where the Arlen Hospital is.

Can you hold it in?

Peggy, it's amazing. You've got to do it.

Uncle Hank, Didi's having the baby right now.

Wait.

Pull the cord. Your emergency cord.

Hey!

Peggy?

I think my wife... I think, might be dead.

I'll be right back.

Peggy!

Dangit. Didi. Push!

It's okay, son. The baby's here.

- He's beautiful. - What's his name?

Here you go. To cut the umbilical cord.

Oh.

My uncle.

Peggy?

Aunt Peggy?

No!

Okay. Think one piece. Peggy?

Hey, hey, hey.

- God! You're all smashed up. - I'm alive.

Uncle Hank, we're too late.

- Would you like to hold your baby now? - I'm not the father.

Yes, I would.

Okay. Move it.

Good, Keep her straight,

Please, sir, don't touch her.

Oh, God.

Aikman takes the snap, a quick pass over the middle to Smith...

the 20, the 10,

- Emmitt Smith scores! - Yes!

Hank Hill? HANK: I wasn't watching.

Just for a second.

I have no idea what the score is. I couldn't tell you.

- Your wife is gonna be just fine. - Yes!

Peggy has a compression fracture of the bones in her back.

Thank goodness for the mud.

She would not have survived if she had fallen on concrete...

or a fence.

But she's okay?

Yes. They're putting her into a body cast to immobilize her while she heals.

- What color is the cast? - What does that matter, Mr. Hill?

I don't know. I've never been through this before.

I'm just trying to ask the right questions.

- It's white. Sponge bath. Bedpan. - Thank you.

- Peggy? - Hank. Come on in.

Look at me. I'm in an ensemble.

My top cast and my bottom cast match.

Yeah. Quality plaster.

I'm guessing that was Luanne.

I wish she wouldn't feel sorry for me when I feel so terrific for me.

I have had a near-death experience.

Most people never get that...

except when it's next to their death experience.

Then they can't appreciate it.

You know what's odd?

The last thing I remember was deciding not to jump.

What or who would have made me change my mind?

I'm not sure.

I don't know. I wasn't in the plane. I was on the ground, remember?

I'm the one who found you.

I fell 8,000 feet and survived!

- Bobby? - Dad.

Thank God! I need a dollar bad.

- Mom? - Bobby?

- You really fell out of a plane? - Yes, sir. I did.

Your mom is one of only 16 people...

who have survived parachutes not opening.

Now, 16 is my estimate. I'll double-check my numbers later.

I'm sorry about before. I don't know what came over me.

Oh, God!

What would make you jump out of a plane?

That's exactly what I can't figure out.

Don't try too hard, 'cause the doctor says...

that could hurt your bones somehow.

So, Bobby, how was your day?

My day?

Don't get me started!

My day was incredible.

I was Didi's birthing partner.

I cut the umbilical cord.

Didi! Where's Didi?

What did you do to your wife? I didn't teach you that.

Where's my new dependent? I'm supposed to look at it.

Where did I put... There it is.

Uncle, I present you to your father.

Look at him. His shins are perfect.

Look at you. You're a handsome little soldier.

You wanna kill a Nazi?

A Nazi, Nazi-scrazzi.

Didi, did you name this baby yet? DIDl: What's the use?

I'm calling him Hank. I always wanted a boy named Hank.

Dad, Hank is my name.

Not anymore. I'm taking it back. He's Hank.

You can't take away a grown man's name.

All right. I'll call him G.H. Good Hank.

Did you see the way my boy looked at that nurse?

Practically slapped her rump then and there.

Yeah. Uncle Good Hank is really something special.

Dad, this isn't right.

You call him Good Hank it's gonna make it sound like I'm Bad Hank.

You burnt my burger, didn't you, B.H.?

Peggy, you've gotta do it. It's amazing.

It's the best dang feeling in the world.

No, don't tell her that. Why did you tell her that?

No. Of course it's safe. It's fail-safe.

I guarantee you, you'll love it.

I command you to jump.

If you love me, you'll jump.

Jump, jump, jump...

There we go.

Okay. Now you try.

We'll see about all this.

Okay. Put this little nipper in here, tuck this little nipper in there.

Close up shop. There. Ready for soiling.

What the...

The kid is leaking out of his chest.

That's from his nipples. It's a form of lactation.

Dangit. You said it was a boy.

He is. He's simply been ingesting a lot of female hormones from his mother.

It's so common it has a name. Which is milk.

Lord! What did I do?

Was it the 50 men I killed?

The maternity ward ceiling.

It reminds me of when my son was born.

And I am also reminded of when my next child will be born.

- Why isn't the baby with his mother? - Didi Hill has postpartum depression.

She couldn't even gather up the strength to put on some lipstick.

And she looks awful.

That poor infant baby. Is there something I can do?

That's all right, ma'am.

You just try not to get addicted to that morphine.

You did this to my son. There's no milk coming out of these.

Cotton, stop it.

- You should be comforting her. - Comfort her? Comfort me.

Mr. Hill, your insurance company's automated voice says...

you have to leave the hospital today, in 85 minutes.

But I can't take care of a dripping witch-child.

Can't we just stay hospitaling until Didi gets her brains back?

Maybe if you were the richest man in America.

More flowers, Mr. Hill? Don't unwrap them.

Why not? They told me downstairs they should be placed in water as soon...

You and your wife and those flowers are going home today.

Yeah. But Peggy's got a broken back.

I know. I told you that. But she wants to be discharged.

I'm not so worried about her back. I'm worried about her emotional state.

Yeah. But she seems so happy.

Once the thrill of surviving wears off...

and it does, trust me, Jetski, July '94...

she may experience a second crash when she feels her own limitations.

There won't be any second crash.

As long as I'm around, I won't let her feel any limitations.

There's no need for you to feel this guilty. You didn't make her jump.

Yeah.

Do you think you could put that on her chart?

- Peggy, I'm here. - Hey!

We're going home today.

I have packed myself up without any help from the nurses,

- Are you sure you're ready? - Honey, ready or not, I have got to go.

I invited Cotton and Didi and the baby to stay with me...

until they can take care of him on their own.

You think you can help them take care of a baby?

If that poor farm boy, whose arms were ripped off by a thresher...

could dial 911 with his nose...

then I think Peggy Hill can take care of that baby.

Maybe I'll sign it on the stomach.

No, the leg. No, the stomach.

Just act natural.

Back off. Back off, everybody.

Everybody.

That's our fault, Peggy, not your fault.

Try the back door. It'll fit.

Am I in a very wide bed?

Maybe we can get her in at an angle. Come on, guys.

All right. On three.

If you lift on three, you mean one, two, dang ol' three and then go...

or do you kind of, like, lift her on three?

Just lift now, okay?

Now.

Tilt towards me. No. Toward...