This Is Us

Previously on This Is Us...

I'm not sure you've ever experienced anything real your entire life.

And that's our cue to leave.

Our lead actress vanished a month ago,

off the face of the planet. You got involved with her.

You slept with the Tony-nominated star of my play

- and ruined everything. - Yeah, well, you know,

I slept with you, too. It didn't ruin anything.

- Yeah, only ten years of therapy. - Rebecca thinks that

if we have kids, our lives are gonna be over.

- She's right, pal. - I love our life.

And I'm scared of changing it,

'cause the truth is when I close my eyes

and I think about our future...

I see us with kids, Jack.

- Yeah. - William Hill,

I loved you and you left.

Now I'd like to spend whatever time

you have remaining together.

Would you?

Dad, grandpa's gay,

or at least bi.

What's that now?

The one thing I cannot live without

is you.

Where were you? Just say it.

- I told you, it's none of your damn business! - Dad! Dad!

Leave her alone.

Jack, it's okay. Go back to your room now.

No.

This your big moment, Jack?

You think you got it in you?

Two of yous deserve one another.

Mom.

Promise me you'll never be like him.

You promise me.

Jack, I love it.

We need a second bedroom for the baby, right?

Okay, crib can go right here.

Or maybe it can go right there.

Am I nesting right now?

'Cause they told me I would start nesting.

Yeah.

Can we even afford this place?

Uh... Didn't that guy say it was $200 a month?

Look, I know that it's more expensive

than their one bedrooms, but you like...

- You like it, right? - Yeah.

Okay, that's good, because I already put

first, last and security deposit.

- What? - Yeah.

Jack!

- Jack! - Yeah, yeah. I already did it.

So is, is this the moment?

Is this, is this when we find out

if we're... we're having a boy or a girl?

Wait, what's wrong, Dr. Schneider?

What would you guys say if I told you

you were having twins?

Well, I...

- I'd say you're lying. - Yeah.

Wha... ?

- I am. - Oh, okay.

You're having triplets.

Never fun telling a young couple they're having three babies

and not just the one they were ready for.

Yeah.

Triplets.

Always a headache with triplets.

Just glad they're your patients, not mine.

- Coming through! - Out of the way, coming through.

Moving out.

Watch your back.

Let's go, we're losing him. Let's go!

Out of the way!

I'm sorry.

Do you know where room 412 is?

Oh, okay. I keep getting turned around in here.

This is what I get for flying across the country

to surprise you.

- You're alive. Stop complaining. - No, I'm tired.

I am cranky. And I have a straw

stuck so far up my junk that I could whistle

"Don't Worry Be Happy" if I sneezed.

- What can I do to make you feel better? - I need you

to lock that door and climb up here.

- Come on. Get up here, come on. - No, I can't.

- You just had a heart attack. - No, I had arrhythmia.

An arrhythmia doesn't even sound serious.

All right, it's harmless. Like, "Hey, what...

Hey, why is that white guy such an awful dancer?"

"Oh, don't mind him. He has arrhythmia."

I'm not mounting you in a hospital.

- Come on, please. - Toby.

At least do that thing where you tickle my...

Hey. I apologize, Nurse Ratchet.

She's insatiable.

She can't get enough.

- It's... come on, give me a kiss. - You're belligerent.

All right. Oh, nice.

Did I get something on you? I'm sorry.

- No, a little something on me. - No. No.

- Give me a kiss. - No!

Give me an oatmeal kiss.

You need to calm down.

I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding.

I've never done that before. I'm...

Oh.

- Good morning. - Hi.

Morning.

It is a good morning, right?

Early risers. You remember Sloane,

the brilliant, genius playwright;

- also the Jew who crashed Christmas. - Ah.

Thank you guys so much for having me. This is...

there is an Uber here, he's outside, uh...

- okay. Bye. - Bye.

Sweetheart. I know what you're thinking.

You're thinking, "Kevin, this is not a flophouse

- that you use for your dates." - Mm-hmm.

Duly noted. It won't happen again.

Okay? I want you to know that. Also,

you're probably thinking that me sleeping

with the writer of a play that I'm producing

is probably going to end up blowing up in my face, right?

- Hmm, I'm on fire this morning. - Mm-hmm.

But we artists don't have, you know,

normal professional relationships.

We have what I like to call...

Wait for it...

"artnerships."

Oh. Okay.

You see what I did? I took "partnership"...

Without the "P". Yep, I followed it.

- You follow it, William? - I'm trying.

- Mm-hmm. - William,

let's get you involved. How is the, uh,

how is the sequel to Beginners going?

It's a Christopher Plummer movie that came out a few years ago

about a guy late in life who comes out of the closet.

- I say that because you're gay now. - I'm not gay now.

I've always loved both women and men.

And, you know, a lot of artists believe

sexuality isn't fixed, as it is fluid.

What's fluid?

Oh, your bio-Daddy's only half gay, it turns out.

Hmm.

Uh, dim sum. I was thinking about

- getting dim sum. - Oh, no, I won't be home tonight...

I'm going out with Jessie.

I could always reschedule.

No, no, no. It's fine. It's all good.

Uh, you and Jessie do your thing.

No soup dumplings for you!

This bedroom feels so much smaller now.

I didn't want to nest for three.

I only wanted to nest for one.

- I know. - How are three kids

supposed to grow up in one bedroom? I...

How are we even going to get strollers

up and down the stairs of a sixth-floor walkup?

We have to get our security deposit back.

We can't. I tried.

Well, I could ask.

They were pretty firm about it.

- I could cry. - I did.

Didn't work.

Look, babe, look, let's not overreact, okay?

L... let's just figure this out.

Of all days to be having lunch with my mother.

Wait until she hears that we're living in a two-bedroom,

sixth-floor walkup with triplets.

The condescension and the judgment.

- Oh! - Oh, Bec, come on...

I know, I know, I know. She's not that bad.

My passive-aggressive mother's nothing compared

to your abusive father... I get it, Jack. Jesus.

I am upset.

And I'm hormonal.

- I know. - And I have...

three human beings living inside of me.

So I've heard.

- You really tried crying? - Oh, yeah. Just full waterworks...

like a little boy.

We're not getting the security deposit back.

But I'm gonna figure something out.

Okay?

- I will. I will figure something out. - Right.

Oh, hey.

I would much rather you get in this tub with me

- than these magazines. - Why am I so thrown by William and Jessie?

- Oh, we're doing that instead, then? - I mean,

what the hell is wrong with me, Beth?

- Am I homophobic? - You are not homophobic.

Well, how do you know?

Because you're good,

and you're open-minded, that's why.

- Plus, your favorite coworker is gay. - Keith's not gay.

- Really? - No, he's French Canadian.

- It's confusing. - Damn.