The Choice

Now, pay attention,

'cause I'm about to tell you the secret to life.

You ready?

The whole damn thing is about decisions,

little, seemingly insignificant decisions

that clear the road for monster truck life-altering ones.

You see, every path you take leads to another choice,

and some choices can change everything.

Every damn moment of the rest of your life hangs on them.

And, boy, do I got a choice I got to make.

Dr. Fulton, please call the admitting office at 325.

Are those for someone special?

Someone who deserves the stars and the moon.

All I got are these damn flowers.

- I'm just here to talk to her. - You go right ahead, Travis.

If that's what you need. If that will help.

PA Thompson to birthing center.

PA Thompson to birthing center.

Too easy on me, Ryan.

You're too hard on you, Travis.

Whoa!

See that dog right there?

They were bred to protect the Arctic villagers

from bear and wolf attacks.

You are so full of crap.

You kiss your mama with that pottymouth?

I don't know how he does it.

What do you mean? It's his gift.

You know all about Star Wars

and Travis is good with the ladies.

We're all dealt a hand.

Them dogs live in the tundra.

They don't swim in the water.

You couldn't get that dog in the water

for an F-150 full of Milk-Bones

driven by Lassie wearing a two-piece,

even if it's a little gold one like that.

So you're saying this dog fights bears and wolves,

but he's afraid of the water.

I see what you're doing.

You're sassing me, and that's just 'cause you like me.

That's schoolyard 101. It happens all the time.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

Need I remind you, I let you take Marcie Hoffman

to the Azalea Fest in seventh grade?

- You let me? Ha! - I let you.

Would you two shut up and help me down?

Or would you prefer to watch me slip and crack my skull?

Oh, excuse me. Look who's sassypants.

You keep that up, there's liable to be some hair-pulling around here.

Hey, Travis.

Hiya, Monica.

Excuse me, ladies.

You got time to grab a beer before y'all take off?

Well, I got to get these knuckleheads home.

Just one quick beer.

It'll be really fast, I promise.

All right.

I don't think you and I have ever had just one.

- Bye, boys. - Bye, Monica.

She's back.

Just like a boomerang.

Unbelievable.

Don't you start.

Can I just say one thing?

If that one thing is "boomerang,"

I'm going to tie an anchor to your nuts and throw it overboard.

- Boomerang! -

Hey!

[children laughing and shouting]

- Hey! - Hey, hey!

Hey!

- Hey, hey! - Hi!

Look alive, fellas. Here come your wives.

Y'all better start talking.

We were about to call the Coast Guard.

We got into some mackerel about three miles out.

They were jumping in the boat.

- Uh-huh. - Price tag, bro.

Come on, kids. Let's go.

Guarantee they've been at Dockside since noon.

Eh, more fun to let them think

they're getting away with something.

[classical music playing on stereo]

- -

- Mobe! - Where is that damn dog?

Useless!

- -

This looks great, Travis. Thank you.

You're welcome!

Aah!

See what he does to me?

Whoa!

Someone bring me a plate.

Y'all just have a good time.

Just kiss on each other and just laugh it up.

I'll just be slaving away over here over the grill like Cinderella.

Hey, turn up the music!

Your burgers are burnt.

I'm not cutting down that damn tree!

I grilled. Y'all are cleaning.

Boy, get out of there.

Fish guts gonna make you sick.

- Good night. - Good night.

- Night, Travis. - Night.

Put this on. Put this on.

[classical music playing on stereo]

Hey, Molly.

Do you know how many liters of blood

the circulatory system processes per day on average?

Oh, my God! Twenty! That's right!

Good girl. You got that right.

Oh, Mol. How you feeling, honey?

Swollen nipples, distended abdomen, lethargic behavior.

Oh, my God, this isn't happening.

This is like Dirty Dancing all over again.

[rock music playing on stereo]

Oh! No, he did not!

Excuse me. Hello!

Yeah, hi. Hello.

Sorry. Um, music's a little loud. I didn't hear you.

Yes, it was. It is so loud...

Hey, you're my new neighbor, aren't you?

I've seen you over there watching me.

- Watching you? - Yeah.

Oh, my God. Wow. I was not watching you.

You live 100 yards away. Where am I supposed to look?

I'm just kidding with you. I'm just playing.

- That is funny. - What do you say we start over?

Uh, why don't you have a seat...

I do not want a seat, thank you.

- Would you like a beer? - I'm fine.

Come on, have a beer. We got, uh...

I do not want that. Thank you.

All right. Well, I'm Travis.

And the rug there, that's Moby.

- Yeah. - And, um...

I think this is the point in the conversation

where you tell me your name.

Oh, you do, do you?

Well, no.

Okay.

Uh, all right.

Fine. Um... you know, there's a certain type of woman

that usually shows up here after 10:00.

She's wearing ratty sweatpants, no makeup,

and she's usually only after one thing.

Oh, my God.

Are you implying I'm here for sex?

- You are, aren't you? - Oh, my God.

I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

Could you be any more obnoxious?

- Lady, you have no idea. - Lady! Stop calling me "lady".

- Then tell me your name. - It is Gabby.

Hello, Gabby. Welcome to the neighborhood.

What are you so angry about?

I am angry about Molly's nipples.

Your stinky-ass dog took advantage of my sweet little girl.

Now her nipples are swollen and she's gained 15 pounds.

She will not get out of bed,

and you play your music too loud!

So you're saying that Moby there knocked up your dog?

Oh, I know Moby there knocked up my dog.

He wanders the neighborhood day and night unsupervised.

He has been wearing her down since the moment that we moved in.

- Wearing her down? - That's right. You're responsible.

That's right, this is my fault.

It's all my fault. I take full responsibility.

I've talked to him so many times about using protection.

Don't patronize me.

- Oh, my God, you are... - I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Look, you're right. This is serious.

This is serious. Um, how long do we have?

I mean, how far along is she?

Oh, God. This is so funny to you.

It's a little funny, yeah.

Well, I'm not exactly sure,

because I haven't taken her to the vet yet.

So how do you even know she's pregnant?

Because I'm a medical student and I'm also a woman.

The second I knew, the first one is...

- Oh, you did? - ...new information.

Oh, you're so smart.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Well, I like your confidence.

And there happens to be a fantastic clinic right here in town.

It's kind of a father-son thing.

- Okay. - And I want you to know,

Moby is not going to be a deadbeat dad.

He's... this is not going to be

one of them Dirty Dancing type situations.

Okay.

He's going to stand up straight like a man.

Hey. Somebody say Dirty Dancing?

Oh.

- Oh, my God. - I'll be inside

eating the rest of the mint chip.

- I'll get you the card. - You know, I'm good.

I can probably figure this out...