Acting Good

It's bingo time!

You look good, Rita.

You too.

You look like you're gonna win.

Eh-eh, gaawiin.

I will say a bingo prayer for you, though.

And I will thank you, when I win.

Okay, the early bird is starting soon.

Hope you find your lucky table.

I got three grandkids; I don't need a lucky table.

- Hey, jar'd! - This lucky table is ours!

I'll remember that.-

You're going down,

you kii-a-skwe mindimooyenh!

I'm not regular kii-a-skwe!

I'm prison kii-a-skwe.

Ho'leh, settle down, Stony Mountain.

Here we are, together, outside work.

- Just relax, bro. - Just chillin'.

Oh yeah, yeah, we're just chillin'.

Although chillin' is a gateway to hangin'.

And you know what can happen after a hang?

Pregnancy?

No, Dean.

Friendship.

Sorry, man, you're just really hard to take

- with your... - town clothes, man.

Like, who tucks in their t-shirt?

Uh, this guy.

Yeah, I tuck everything in-

my t-shirt, my sheets, my socks.

Makes me feel secure, locked in.

You're really letting loose there, eh, Day Off Greg?

Dean, is it just me or is there something going on over there?

Dean: Pretty intuitive, young bingo Padawan.

They're just up in their...

bingo mojo.

Greg: By aiming those charm doohickies at each other?

Dean: So, those charms are sending bad luck to Rita,

and Rita's charms are blocking that bad luck.

Oh, what-- what is that?

...Little warrior.

Dean: Hmm...

Yes, that's the mother of all charms.

That's Coco the Coconut.

Agnes wins big with it every year.

So, bingo is just simple luck.

There's nothing simple about it, bro.

By its very nature,

it's an act of resilience.

In our ancestors' time...-

...our customs and practices were outlawed,

by sickly, bitchy-ass white men, like yourself.

Tried to control what us long-haired,

beautiful warriors did on the Rez.

Sickly? I...

But we bingo'd on,

and that's what makes it tradition...

and cool as fuck.

- Hey, man. - Thanks for the flute.

That really helped the story.

This is for the people, man.

Attention, all players.

Tonight's final prize is $4,000.

This year, we are going to have a good, clean,

fair, no-bullshit monster bingo.

Lips is head of security, so there'll be no funny business.

And I'm talking about you, Hilda, and your black dabber.

We can't see the numbers, we can't verify your bingo.

Bullshit!

Let's go already!

We have some money to give away.

And just like Paul, when he found out Rose was pregnant,

he's got to go!

Oh, yeah!-

Here we go!

What's taking so long?

Don't blame me. This bingo machine is faulty.

I wanted the WinMax 5000,

but I never got the money, thanks to 'Cheap and Council'.

Paul: 'Sup, Jo?

- What da heck! - I just got here!

Under the I, 22.

Two ducks in the water!

Hey, Mom. Big baby.

Let me grab a seat here real quick.

Uh, sorry, Jo, you can't sit with us.

Why the hell not?

You know that being late for bingo is bad luck, and...

you got bad breath.

I'm sorry, Jo, but I do feel something's off.

Where am I supposed to go?

I'm the Chief; I can't sit alone.

Roger: Under the G, 58.

Geez, wouldn't it be great if Jo found a seat?

G-58.

I'm sorry, but this is Monster Bingo,

there's no messing around.

Okay, fuck.

Roger: Under the B, 6.

Hey, but still too close.

Paul: Bye.

Saved you a seat, Chief.

Uh...

- Hey, everybody! - Jo's at the loser table,

and that's your Chief?!

Don't listen to him.

- He calls me a mooch. - Can you believe that?

Hey, can I borrow a dabber?

Roger: Under the B, 8.

Give me the usual: one blue freezie.

- Sorry, Blue. - You don't have enough.

Aw, man.

Hey, you want freezie money for life?

- Yeah. - Then, you gotta earn it.

And sometimes, it ain't pretty.

Watch and learn, freezie face.

- Roger: N-41. - N-41. Time for fun.

One free coffee.

It's two bucks now.

Inflation, bro.

Where's a guy gonna get two bucks from in this economy?

Hey, got two bucks?

What can I get for this?

Chickadee: Fill her up, bro.

Cheap ass.

That's how it's done, Blue.

Roger: N-44 calls out the door.

- N-44. - Oh!

Roger: O-75--

I mean, O-71.

She won't stop looking at me.

She's trying to get into my head.

Roger: O-69.

That's O for Oklahoma and 69 for don't even make the joke, Ed.

What was that number?

O-69.

You got this.

You got the coconut, and you've got me.

Listen to those dabbers on the table, man.

- It's like music. - It's cool.

It's like Jamiroquai.

You believe this mooniya?

I'm surprised he even came out tonight.

I thought he'd be at home drinking milk,

watching documentaries.

Oh, hey, calm down, all right?

Dean, I am still your boss.

North Store Greg is my boss.

Day Off Greg is just some nerd with a moustache.

Look at this guy, he's like part news anchor,

part... catfish.

"This just in, I'm really lame

"and I pull up my pants really high

"because I have a hairy arse. Back to you, Barb."

Weenuk, what's wrong with you?-

Don't get all sad arse now.

When we tease you, it just means we like you.

Then, why does it hurt?

Just take it if you want to be cool.

Teasing is one of the sacred seven teachings.

- It is? - Yeah, man.

Keeps you humble.

Roger: B-11.

B-11 or not to B-11.

Man, you got a lot to learn about being cool on the Rez.

Get your elbows on the table.

Nobody likes a guy with good posture.

Okay?

And throw a bro in here and there... bro.

Bro.

And instead of saying "no", say, "Not even".

Not even.

Yeah, right.

And if somebody rubs you the wrong way, say,

"Go fuck yourself then."

Isn't that a little harsh?

Here, try it.

More bingo cards?

Not even, bro.

Cool.

And go fuck yourself, then.

This kind of rhymes.

Under the N, 37.

Bingo!

Paul: Yeah!

Roger: We have a bingo.

Early bird goes to Agnes.

Yeah, I see how it is,

just because your daughter's Chief.

That's a good bingo.

What do you want, bro?

- I lost my glasses. - Anyone return them?

Someone returned his glasses already.

Let's see what you got.

No, sir, nobody's turned in anything.

But...

can I interest you in these?

- The heck, boy! - These look like mine!

You have good taste!