An Innocent Kiss

*

*

* Don't ask me no favors, sweetie *

* Don't ask me for a damn thing *

*

* Don't ask me no favors, baby *

* Don't ask me for a damn thing *

*

* Every time that I need you

*

* But you don't know my name

*

* Did I look that gunshot winner, baby *

* Seen you kissing on that man *

*

* But I look that gunshot winner baby *

* Seen you kissing on that man *

*

Hey, Barnes?

Hey, Barnes, you need to put a leash

on those young'uns of yours, all of them.

Hey, Barnes, you find anything yet?

Can you hear me all right?

You got a problem.

Well, you got termites.

- Termites? You sure about that?

- I'm positive. - Well, how bad is it?

- Well, let me put it like this.

If the termites weren't holding your house up, it'd fall down.

I'm gonna have to give you a special treatment

down here and inside.

What you gonna do about that?

Oh, this what Henry did?

Yup.

- Well, ain't nothing I can do about either one right now.

I'm running late, but I'll get to 'em.

- All right, then, we'll see if you do.

All right.

*

- Twins, what in the world are you doing, huh?

You do know it's a school day, don't you?

- Ah, shoot. - Excuse me?

- I said shoot. - No, I heard what you said,

and that ain't what you said, and I should wash your mouth

out with grandpa's castor oil. That's what I ought to do.

- Mama, we thought it was Saturday.

No, honey, that's tomorrow.

Come here.

Hey, now, I might be wrong, but I swear we used

to have books back when I was in school.

I didn't have any homework.

Oh, by the way, I'm going to Amy's house tonight.

- Are you asking me, or are you telling me?

I ain't waiting on them.

- All right, get your little rear ends inside

and get dressed before you miss the bus, all right?

Hey, what's the matter, Timmy? - I don't feel good.

- Well, you just felt fine to be playing,

didn't you? Now, go on.

- These pants are still wet. - Get in the house!

Henry, get your butt up.

You're gonna be late for school.

Come on, boy. - I ain't going today, sorry.

- Suit yourself. It's your future.

- Oh, you're going to school. Get--

Ellie?

Hey.

What's up? - Look.

Your dog has scattered trash all over my yard again.

I ain't picking it up.

- What makes you so sure it was my dog?

Shadrack, hey! Cut that out.

All right, well, what makes you so sure it was my trash?

Oh, we don't even eat there, so.

- You know, it might not hurt to get his nuts cut, either.

Keep that mutt away from my Maxine.

- Not my dog's fault, Mr. Melvie.

Maxine, she's a little hottie.

- Well, something's got to be done about it.

And something will be.

All right, now.

See you later.

- All right. -

What was that all about?

- What was what all about? - You know what.

- That ain't nothing. - Yeah, I'll bet it wasn't.

- You're jealous, aren't you? - No, I ain't.

I just don't like the neighbors seeing you in your nightgown.

- It's just Gordon. - Especially Gordon.

He might get the wrong idea.

- He might get something. - You ain't funny.

- Hey, you coming home for lunch today?

Why?

- I don't know. I'm just--I'm just asking.

Well, you fixing something?

- Well, no. I mean, I ain't fixing nothing special.

- Well, then why would I come home?

That don't make no sense.

- Well, hello! - Hey.

Look who's here.

I made him sleep on the couch last night.

He's not happy about it. - Good for you.

- I know. Yay, Caroline. We're gonna have fun.

- You might need to change her diaper.

I smell cock-a-poodie.

- Ooh, you got a little poo-poo, Caroline?

Ooh, that ain't no little poo-poo.

Get on. Get those toys, girl.

Okay. - Oh, thank you so much.

You don't mind? - No, are you kidding.

Don't you worry about a thing. - All right.

* Yeah

*

* Where you go you made the light *

* You put the stars in the night *

* Came without them, back inside *

- Hey, where you two going? You miss the bus again?

Yeah.

Are you going to school?

Yeah, for once.

Hey, how about you guys hop in?

- You wore the same thing yesterday.

- Yes, you're all clean now. You're all clean.

Ma, that sucks.

- Hey, what are you doing home so early?

- I couldn't find a parking spot.

- Well, you are absolutely useless, boy.

- So? - Here, make yourself useful.

Come on.

I don't want that.

- Help me out. Say, "Help me out."

Oh, please.

Say, "Thank you, Henry."

- * Some days rock and some don't *

*

- Howdy, Barnes. - Hey, hey.

- Elmer, show Mr. Barnes what we found back there.

There's more bugs than usual.

- I seen your commercial. - Yeah? Which one?

- The one where you're getting drug behind that 4x4.

Man, that was a hoot, I tell you what.

- How much I owe you, Bo? - 10.

I like the one where you're jumping off the--

off the roof, too, like a superhero.

- How much for the mirror? - That includes the mirror.

That's right, $10.

Hey, you come back now, you hear?

Man, I should have give him that darn mirror.

What's the verdict back there?

- Eh, nothing new. I know what the problem is.

- I should have give him the haircut too.

Okay, well, what you gonna show me?

- Need to cover that hole up right there.

- We'll take care of it. Thanks, sir.

- All right. Have a good 'un, Elmer.

*

[tires screech, vehicles crash]

- You have any idea how hard it is

to get parts for that car, Barnes?

*

*

Yeah, it's Randy Barnes.

Some sicko just broke into my brother's house.

No, I done chased him off. There's no apparent danger.

You gonna want to send somebody up here anyway.

Well, yeah, he did appear to be on dope or something,

not that I would know, but--

- Man, I'm glad to see you guys.

- Hold it right there, mister. - Hey, this is my house.

Yeah, I bet it is.

Sir, you're making a mistake.

- No. - A big mistake.

- You're the one that made the mistake.

- Ow! - Yeah, that's what you get

for threatening an officer of the law.

Mick, you want to take this fat boy out of here?

- Sir, you seem like you're fairly intelligent.

- What in the w--what is going on?

Gordon?

- Hey! - You all right?

Wha--hello?

- You'll have to ask that guy right there.

He's in charge.

I don't know if we supposed to tell or not.

- Apparently this turkey was caught breaking and entering

into that house over... there.

- You boys are quick. - Randy!

- Hey, Ellie. Good thing you wasn't here.

Don't worry, I took care of your little intruder problem.

- No-- Randy, this is--