The Comeback

There, can you feel it growing?

Oh, it's definitely growing.

Yeah, double "ontand."

This is a lot like that movie Ghost.

It is. Yeah.

Except without the sexual undertones.

Right. No sexual undertones.

Should I use one finger or two for the opening?

Two is always better.

Sorry.

Oh, Mark, it's the best part.

Oh, it's Greg calling again. You know, he texted earlier.

Why? What does he want?

Uh, okay, pause.

Here.

Okay, answer it.

Hello?

Okay, you...

Well, that's interesting.

Alright, man.

You guys finally playing golf?

Lunch.

And I quote, "I don't like how that all went down."

Val, he's starting a new firm and...

Wants you to be a part of it?

- Yeah. - Oh! Look at that.

Oh, Mark, that's so great. Marky Mark!

Oh!

Now, I can give you those places I found to get that tattoo removed.

Ha! Okay.

- Can we finish my show? Yeah. - What? Yeah, yeah.

Thanks for watching How's That?!

You can also enjoy How's That?! Commercial-free...

Wow, Val, you look great.

That's not me. I didn't shoot that.

I didn't say that. That's not my suit.

And while you're at it, Mark...

You said my name?

- Okay, rewind. - nothing but Nu...

And while you're at it, Mark, you can sign up for our sports package...

Oh! My name's on the account.

So, is this like an AI thing?

It's TV our way, your way. How's That?!

Yeah, I got scanned at the Digital Dome.

That must have been what that was for.

That's okay. Yeah. Just wanna use me as a spokesperson.

Did you get paid extra for this?

Don't know. Docusigned it.

Did my arms move funny?

Not that I could tell. Well, I'm going in.

Okay. I'm gonna stay up a little.

Val?

- Hm? - The show was good.

- Aw. - So don't stay up all night

looking at your phone to see what other people thought.

Okay, no, I don't do that anymore.

Alright? I've learned my lesson.

- Okay. - Yeah.

- Mark, I looked! - Val!

Oh, I know. Ugh!

No, you gotta take my phone. Don't give it back tonight.

What's with all this online bullshit about our show?

Alright, PDP, stop.

You can't pay attention to any of it.

No. You can't, okay?

'Cause haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate.

Shake it off, shake it off. That's my Taylor Swift.

- You know. - My boyfriend loved the show.

- Aw. - Yeah, I think people

are still mad about the AI stuff.

Well, not all the hate is about AI.

"The sheriff walks too slow. Did he have a stroke?"

No, I did not. That's my character walk!

- Yeah, it is! - Okay, you know what?

Feels bad. Can't let it in.

When I did Seeing Red, that was around the time

when regular people online

started thinking their opinions mattered, right?

And I read all of it, okay?

Read a bad thing, had to stay online till I found a good thing.

Bad thing, "She can't act."

Good thing, "Yeah, she's old, but I'd still do her."

Okay? And do you know what I got?

Really depressed?

I got this.

No way!

- Val! - Shit!

Right? Thought we might need a little inspiration today.

'Cause when it comes to other people's opinions

don't listen to Emmy of them!

Right?

Isn't that cute? Thought of that in the car.

I need a picture with it.

Of course you do!

Yeah. Come on over. Everybody, step up.

Ha-ha! We'll do it. Okay, ready?

- Ready. - Hi, hi!

- Okay, so... - Getting a picture.

Oh, sorry.

Looks good.

Okay, yeah, that's it.

So, there's a Zoom call for all of you from NuNet.

We'll start rehearsals right after.

- Thanks, Bev. - Do you think this Zoom

is about the ratings?

At least when we had the overnights, I knew whether to be nervous or not.

Well, yeah, you know. Remember, we're a new show, okay?

I'm It!, when it started, it only got...

We're number one on NuNet.

- We are? We're number one? - Where did you see that?

On NuNet. Number one of all their shows.

Could just be spin. All the new networks cook the books.

Brandon's five minutes behind.

Okay, yeah, Brandon. Guys, that's the head of NuNet, okay?

So, this is it, right?

He's picking us up for a season two. What else could it be?

"Goodbye and thank you."

Jesus Christ, Frank! Can you have any joy, ever?

- Are we ready to go? - Okay, you have Brandon.

Thank you, Abby. Hey, everybody. Hey.

- Hi. - Sorry to keep you waiting.

We have a big morning here.

We thought the first episode

would do big numbers because of the AI press

and the hater hoopla, so we aired the first two episodes back-to-back

to see what the drop-off would be.

And you guys retained 70, 72. 72% stayed.

And we couldn't be more pleased with that,

because that means that 72% of the audience

accept an AI-written show, and they like you all enough

- to hang around. - Okay.

And see some more.

So, with that in mind,

I would like to do...

Season two? You want a season two?

Yes, we would like to do a season two.

- Yeah! - Oh, gosh!

- Thank you! - That's fantastic!

How's that? And Valerie, at the end of the week,

I'm gonna do a little press victory lap to announce season two.

And as executive producer and star of this new hit show,

I'd like to invite you to join me. Are you available?

Try to stop me!

Well, great. Thank you. That's great. Congrats, everybody.

- Aw, thank you. - Well done.

- Thank you. - And thanks for your support...

- Oh, okay, he's gone. - Oh, God.

Well, we got a season two! We did it! We did it!

You did this for us, Valerie. You did.

- Yes. Yes. - No, it was all of us.

- Val, Val! - Val!

- No. - Val! Val! Val! Val! Val!

Val! Val! Val! Val! Val!

Val! Val! Val! Val! Val!

Val! Val!

Oh, shit!

- Shit! - What happened?

- Oh, it bounced off the table. - Oh!

Okay.

- Well... - Oh, fuck!

Why was I pounding the stupid fucking table like that?

Thank you, yeah. That's okay.

Oh, my God, I'm such an asshole.

- No. - I'm such an asshole!

This is what happens when I feel joy.

Oh, my God, Val, I'm so, so sorry.

- I broke your Emmy. - No, it's okay.

- Oh, my God! Oh, my God! - Alright, let me...

- I wish I was dead. I wish I was dead. - No, come here.

I should be fucking...

- No, no, no, no, come here. - I should be dead

- like my brother. I should be dead... - Hey!

Look at me, look at me, look at me, okay?

- I'm sorry. - Alright? Now, it broke.

- It's fine, okay? - It's not...

It's just a talisman.

Okay? And it served its purpose.

The night I won that, my husband and I got back together.

Okay? We both showed up

for a dear friend in the hospital.

And it taught me what's really important.

And that's relationships.

I found someone who can fix it.

Someone can fix it?! Okay, it's getting fixed!

- So... - Yay.

But, you know, I was ready to let it go, and that's what's important.

So, yeah.

- Any collab news from Nivea? - Nope.

- Not yet. - Valerie.

- Hi. - Hi.

Dylan Lars from Jack Stevens Productions.

- Oh. - Jack saw your show

and wants to say hi.

Jack Stevens wants to say hi to me? Okay. When?

- Get in. - Oh, now?

He wants to say hi right now?

Well, my husband and I are having dinner with old friends.

Won't be long.

His office is just around the way, and I'll bring you right back.

- Who's Jack Stevens? - "Who's Jack Stevens?"