House

Who picked this dump?

You suggested it.

I suggested you look into it.

Sorry, the online reviews...

Were obviously written by some geek in their own marketing department.

Next time, call someone you know.

Stop relying on a computer to do your job for you.

Brightsize Apparel,

eight sexual harassment suits in two years.

- Who asked for the meeting? - They did.

Patty Michener, President of Women's Majority.

And, wow, do you guys need me.

Nine men?

No one thought it might be a good idea to put a suit on one of the gals

from the steno pool to make it look like you give a damn?

We've made it a priority to promote more women, but...

Well, from now on, you have me standing beside you.

Which is good, because your problem is a national problem.

With all due respect, Miss Michener,

I'd hardly call a few isolated incidents a national problem.

Six out of 10 victims never even report harassment,

this is bigger than just eight women.

That still only means 20.

Not enough for you?

How many asses does your corporate policy allow you to grab?

Tell you what you're going to do,

you're gonna settle with anyone you haven't settled with,

you're going to fire any man who's even been accused.

Somebody, help me!

Please, help me! I can't get them off!

Please help me! Help me, please!

Somebody help me! Get them off!

You gonna call an ambulance or you just gonna sit there and stare?

Help me, please!

Wilson's back. You gonna...

Been gone two months,

he can wait till I finish slaying a guy in a skullcap and a pair of tights.

On a video game you stole from the pediatric ward?

On advice of counsel, I assert my privilege pursuant to the Fifth.

When was the last time you talked to him?

Uh, I think it was after...

When did his girlfriend die?

He wanted time alone.

I considered being a horrendous pain in the ass,

but I didn't want to tread on your turf.

We got a case.

I got to remember to close the blinds.

Just got a call from Patty Michener,

from Women's Majority, the women's rights...

- We know who she is. - I dated her.

Well, not really dated her,

more metaphorically raped her by having a penis.

- You did, too. - Her assistant flipped out,

ripped off her clothes in front of a roomful of businessmen.

Either she cracked under the whip,

or she started to realize that her evolutionary purpose

is to arouse men, not to castrate them.

Send her to psychiatric...

Anemia, bradycardia,

and abdominal pain aren't psychiatric symptoms.

Then it's the latter, send her to my apartment.

I'll give it to Segal.

House actually wants a case, and you're saying no?

House has more important things to do.

Sorry, can't help you.

You need a specialist to remove those kinds of warts.

Preferably one with experience spelunking.

Hallucinations, possible memory loss,

tests show anemia, slow heart rate,

and a stubborn refusal to shave her pits.

Have you seen Wilson?

No, but I have seen the patient's frequent flyer balance.

Eastern Europe, Asia, third-world countries,

sometimes more than one a day.

No fever means it's not a tropical disease.

If it's not where she went, maybe it's the work hours.

Could be amphetamine abuse.

She's probably popping them like breath mints.

You haven't been by his office?

Is Wilson hallucinating ants crawling all over him, too?

Tox screen's cleaner than the windows she won't do.

Her job keeps her constantly on the road,

probably living off of airline peanuts and diet soda.

Severe B12 deficiency could cause all her symptoms.

Why is everyone leaping to conclude

a strong career woman's been made sick by her strong career?

It's not B12. It's an insulinoma in her pancreas,

it's making her hypoglycemic.

Great, now everyone knows.

You knew the patient had cancer?

Is that what she said?

I thought she said,

"I'm suddenly and irrationally defending the patient's strong career,

"even though in reality she's just a glorified grunt"

"because I'm trying to convince myself that it's okay not to have a life,"

"'cause I don't have a life, because I was tested for Huntington's"

"and my life span's been cut in half."

Been waiting two months for her to say that.

Hallucinations, anemia, bradycardia...

Hyper segmented pews says that Taub's fight.

Pump her full of B12,

see how a strong career woman's been made sick by her strong career.

Are you okay?

It could be years before you see any symptoms.

Why wouldn't you tell us?

I don't have Huntington's.

Are you lying to us? Because it's none of our business.

If it's none of your business, I shouldn't have to answer questions.

And I wouldn't have to, except House doesn't want to answer

questions about Wilson.

He's deflecting his own problems onto me.

Are you deflecting now?

Time for the B12 cocktail and my life lesson.

No, Patty'll do the hearing,

she just needs to be the lead-off witness so she...

Okay. I'll lock it down today.

Need you back in bed.

My boss has a big Beijing trip, I've been planning it for months.

I was just tired and dehydrated...

Yeah, whenever I lose some shut-eye,

I pound my legs clawing at imaginary ant colonies.

You have a severe B12 deficiency.

Get back in bed.

I'm sure your boss can do without you for a few days.

It's not about her, it's about me.

I want to be there, I want to matter.

Yeah, I mean, without you, who knows how much starch they'd put in her shirts?

I'm sorry, I'm sure your boss depends on you for...

- I need to get up. - No, you need to stay in bed.

Please, where's the bed pan? Oh, my God, I'm sorry, I just...

I just had a bowel movement.

It's okay, B12 deficiency can cause sudden...

That's not a bowel movement.

My patient is still fighting in the feminist trenches, but the war is over.

Yesterday's sluts are today's empowered women,

today's sluts are celebrities. If that isn't progress...

I'm leaving.

What, you're gonna take another two months?

Boy, you're really milking this bereavement thing, aren't you?

I mean, good for you. Take all the time you need.

I'm resigning.

Maybe moving out of New Jersey, I don't know yet.

Okay, that's an understandable reaction.

It's not a reaction, it's a decision.

I'm writing Cuddy my resignation right now.

I'm just back for the week to wrap up my clinical and administrative duties.

You of all people should know, this is bereavement 101.

You think that a change in venue...

Well, that spares me decades of psychoanalysis.

I'm not saying you're not in pain.

You're saying my pain's a cliché.

I'm saying that pain fades.

Did yours?

Physical pain is different.

I'd rather have my leg chopped off.

You don't know that 'cause you haven't felt...

Neither have you.

Sorry, patient's got a rectal bleed.

- I'm busy. - We need you to...

Actually, as you can see, I'm not busy.

It was just a euphemism for "get the hell out of here."

This is your grief talking, and, yeah, it is a bit textbook.

So before you give away all your possessions to the Salvation Army...

My girlfriend's dead.

I'm glad you've read that book before, I haven't.

I'm late to meet Dr. Olan to brief him on the case I'm handing over.

Bye.

It doesn't bother you that House wouldn't take

just two seconds to talk about the patient?

Wilson's dealing with a lot.

And our patient may be dying.

She was bleeding out her rear, we're looking up her rear.

You think we needed House's expertise to set us on this course?

Her heart rate's slow, bleed should have made it faster.

And it can wait till after we know where it came from.

And after he's done dealing with personal issues.

Yeah? That the way it works around here?

We get cut slack while we deal with personal issues?

You're not the boss.

Boss gets to make the rules, boss gets to ignore...

She's bleeding from nowhere.

You did an endoscopy?

And a colonoscopy.

- CT scan? - Ordered.

But it shouldn't show anything the endoscopy didn't.

- We can't do a CT scan. - Why not?

We don't need a CT scan, we don't need House.

Stop grinning and talk.

One of the routine pre-procedure tests was positive.

- Which one? - The one that if it's positive

would explain a hormone imbalance

that could screw with heart rate and blood flow.

Guess she does have a life beyond her career.

I'm Pregnant?

You want to call the father? Let him know?

Soon as you do some DNA testing, let me know.

Must be hard to have a real relationship when you're...

Are you making excuses for me?

I'm just saying it's understandable.

You only have to understand something if it needs an explanation.