RuPaul's Drag Race

RuPaul's Drag Race

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Season 12

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RuPauls Drag Race S12 WEB-DL NF
A Commentary by tedi
Pure Retail NF Not sync to any versions yet

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Published on: 2023-05-17
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The first 189 lines.

Looking for a new political party?

Are you tired of politics as usual?

I'm Donald Trump, and I do not approve this message.

Join the RuPaul's Drag Race Party.

Life, liberty and the pursuit of opulence!

Let's meet your candidates.

Here we go, sis.

Y'all thirsty?

My name is Brita, and I am the queen of New York City.

I'm the first bitch here. Ah!

Everyone who knows drag in New York City

knows who Brita is.

I was really hoping the other girls would be here

so that they could see the winner.

I have seven shows a week in New York City.

And then we do it all-- commercials,

TV, singing, dancing.

I took over New York City,

and now it's time to take over the world.

Oh, girl, I look good.

Most people think I'm a big, old Black lady,

but I'm a Polynesian princess.

My dad is from the kingdom of Tonga.

Out of drag, I'm definitely Maui.

And then at night, I turn into Moana.

I guess we'll just wait for those other hos to come out.

Yes, Mama. I'm so excited.

I can't wait to see these other girls that I'm gonna beat.

Well, that was a long flight.

My name is Nicky Doll, and I am one French diva.

I am originally from Paris, France

and recently relocated to New York City.

My looks are very inspired

by European runways from the '90s.

And my performances are dancy

without all the shenanigans and the splits and all that.

So I'm bringing glamour without breaking my hip.

-Nicky Doll. -Muah, muah.

Nicky Doll, oh, yes! You're from New York City!

-Yes! -Look at you, Mama.

You like my little Jean-Paul Gaultier realness?

Yes, come on, New York City queen!

Wait, aren't you from somewhere else, too?

I'm originally from Paris, France,

but I moved to New York a year and a half ago.

Oh, I see.

Nicky Doll is the fashion queen. She's gonna bring beauty, grace

and a cute little lace.

But she ain't coming for me in the...

in the performance area.

I'm happy to see there's other New York queens here.

I know, right? I'm gonna win though.

Yeah, I'll tell you goodbye when it's the right time.

Relax your throat, bitches, 'cause you're gagging.

It's Widow Von'Du.

Thirty years old, but you couldn't tell.

I mean, she looks good though.

Werk, bitch, slay, Mother Goose, mother God, hey.

For those of you that don't know me,

I am the nastiest bitch from Kansas City.

And for those of you that do know me...

you're fucking welcome.

Hi!

How are you?

-Good, how are you? -You're gorgeous.

Oh, my God. Yes, bitch, you're a beat.

Come on, big girl!

They call me the Thickums Herself, honey.

Get you a taste, look at this!

Get into all of this, all of it.

And that's "all" with, like, four A's,

eight O's and three L's.

Awwl.

Yes, bitch.

So how do you feel being sandwiched

in between us two big girls right here?

I feel safe.

-I brought my security guards. -

You know, just in case another ho's super jealous.

The big girl's about to bring it to these little skinny hos,

and they better be prepared.

Roll call!

I know that bitch.

I'm Jackie!

Salaam. The Persian princess of drag has arrived.

- -Oh!

I'm Jackie Cox, and I'm 34 years young.

I'm a Middle Eastern nerd.

And I'm the Persian Annette Funicello of drag.

-Oh, holla! -Oh, my God, Jackie!

I'm so excited to see Jackie Cox in the Werk Room.

That's my sister from NYC.

-Oh, my God! - Oh, my God. We made it.

-I know someone. -Look at this.

-I know someone. - Right?

Jackie Cox is the queen

of the cabaret scene in New York City.

-What are your names? -I'm Widow.

Widow, I'm so sorry.

I do a little comedy. I do a little singing.

I love performing off-Broadway.

Ta-da!

I love to drop in to a character.

-Wait, what does your dress say? -Oh, it says my name in Farsi.

So it says "Jacqueline" in Farsi.

-Jacqueline. -Oh, I love it!

But watch out because Jacqueline

is also the name of my evil twin.

Jackie is not really so much of a look queen.

I know that she's gonna bring her smarts to the show,

but I don't know if she's gonna give us the glamour

that you need for RuPaul's Drag Race.

Three New York City queens so far.

Three? Wait, oh, 'cause you're from--

-Yeah! -I'm like, France!

- -New York City!

In the house, honey!

America, it's time to stop hiding in the closet.

What the fuck is this bitch doing?

-All right, tongue power. - Mm-hmm.

OK, is someone trying to come for my culture?

You know, it sounds a little bit like a Persian trill.

I see you're not the only cunning linguist

in this, uh, group here.

I am Heidi N Closet. I am 24 years of fabulousness,

and I'm from Ramseur, North Carolina,

where the chicken outnumber the people.

Heidi is serving her pimptress outfit.

I know I look good in my, uh, leprosy print.

- -Hello!

My drag is very SPF 100.

Sassy, professional, fierce, and she keeps it 100.

What kind of drag do you do?

Well, she is more of just a performance queen.

She's always ready to dance and twirl

and kick and everything.

The most important part to me in drag is to be entertaining,

'cause if you're not entertaining,

it's like watching the wall dry.

Paint dry?

-Is that how you say it? - Uh-huh.

Oh, my gosh, we're here!

Yes! Right?

Isn't it crazy?

That's my mating call. Clearly, I'm single.

OK.

Oh, oh, oh!

Ahoy.

My name is Gigi Goode, and I'm not just good, I'm incredible.

When I'm entering a room in drag,

I really am trying to have that Cinderella story moment

where everyone is just kind of, like, "Who's that bitch?"

Argh, mateys!

I love it, honey!

The Pirates of the Caribbean was in town.

Oh, my God!

Is one of her legs a peg leg?

I need to know right now.

Oh, I know her.

Fashion means everything to me.

I see my drag going to the cover of Vogue.

Period.

What's up?

Hi, I'm Gigi.

I've heard about you. I've seen you on Instagram.

-You're, like, fierce. -Oh, my gosh.

So nice to meet you.

OK, so Gigi Goode is also bringing fashion.

I know her from Instagram.

She's definitely gonna be tough competition,

and I can't wait to put her down.

I am living for this outfit of yours.

Thank you. My mother made it.

-Birth mother... -Yes.

-...or your drag mother? -Both.

Your mom is your drag mom?

Technically, yeah.

She's a theatrical costume designer so...

Oh, re-- Oh, yes.

Are you a good seamstress? I'm sure 'cause--

I am. My mom taught me how to sew.

OK.

Awesome! How old are you?

-I'm 21 years old. -

- Twenty-one! - Oh, yes.

-Fresh off the boat. - Oh, wow, look at that.

I think the first impression of me is going to be,

"Oh, God, here's another fashion queen.

No personality, no talent, no humor."

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