It Shall Not Be Named

Jessie?

Jessie.

Jessie.

Who's there?

Hello?

(KAT GASPS)

I'm so glad you pointed that out.

I actually have a lot of experience

in social media marketing.

I helped an influencer friend of mine

successfully launch a beauty product campaign that I,

- (DRAMATIC MUSIC) - Ah!

- (GASPS) - Oh my God!

That was an interview.

Oops.

What did you think was gonna happen?

Great, he just declined my call.

Look, I'm sorry.

I didn't know that was an interview.

Yes you did.

Okay, yeah, maybe I did.

It just must have slipped my mind.

I didn't do it on purpose.

Everything slips your mind these days.

Do you know that?

Okay, here we go again.

I try and do a harmless prank to cheer you up

and that makes me the worst guy in the world why exactly?

Why? You just lost me my one chance at a job.

That's why.

So what?

He probably had to talk to, like, 50 other people after you.

That's not the point.

Okay. It was a simple mistake.

No need to murder me for it.

And why are you dressed half naked anyways?

You look ridiculous.

I lost track of time.

Oh, so you lost track of time

and that makes me the bad guy?

Yes, it does.

I made it to my interview on time.

Does this mean we're not having sex tonight?

Yes.

No. Maybe.

That's not the problem right now.

But little Chris wants to take a walk in the park.

Stop it.

Peek through the bushes.

See if there's a cave nearby.

You're being very silly right now.

Oh, I'm gonna show you silly.

(LIGHT MUSIC)

Phew, wow.

We should do this more often.

We're doing it already. (LAUGHS)

Maybe I just can't get enough of you.

You'll get bored.

Babe, I'm different.

Right.

I'm serious.

We should just move in together already.

It's too soon.

But you and I work.

I don't wanna spoil what we have

and there's no need to rush things.

And you know I don't have a job right now.

But that's why I can pay the bills.

I just can't.

But why?

Because it's too much weight to put on your shoulders.

It's just not right.

Babe, I don't care.

I can make it work.

You're so sweet.

But I really wanna figure this out on my own.

As a matter of fact...

What?

I already posted an ad for a roommate today.

You were gonna tell me this when?

Soon, I guess.

You guess?

Look, I didn't mean it like that.

No, yeah, I'm sure you didn't.

You're acting like a baby.

Come back to bed, please.

I gotta work.

Like you said, I already have too much on my plate.

Chris.

Hey, Jessie?

Don't be shy. Come on in.

So how's the real estate market?

Bleeding, but not dead yet, so.

You know, I've always wanted to get into real estate.

Oh, really?

Yeah, I think there's something really nice

about helping someone find a home to build a family.

Well, what's holding you back?

I can't really afford an entry level position right now.

Oh, I see.

Oh, actually,

my sister is gonna come and pick me up any minute now,

so do you think we can carry on this conversation

a little later?

Of course. (LAUGHS)

Silly me. I talk too much.

You go have fun and we'll catch up later.

How's the new roommate?

She's good.

She went to hang out with her sister for a bit.

Hope she doesn't end up being a party animal

bringing home something we don't want.

True.

But you just let her move in right on the spot?

You didn't even get a copy of her ID?

I guess you have a point.

Yeah.

You can never be too careful with strangers.

So what are you doing tonight?

Let's give it just a bit.

I don't wanna encourage her to bring home people

on the very first night.

Wow, day one and I'm already outta the picture.

I need a drink.

Oh, poor you.

You'll get a turn.

Let's not overwhelm her with your enthusiasm just yet.

Hey, she can always join.

Sharing is caring, after all.

- (LAUGHS) - Shut up.

It seems like the blood is flowing to a part of your body

far away from your brain right now, so I'm gonna go.

Nighty-night.

Hey.

I hope you don't mind.

What is that for?

It's always good to cleanse the space

when you move into someplace new.

Like for the evil spirits? (LAUGHS)

Something like that.

What happened here?

Oh, this?

It's just a scratch.

It's no big deal.

By the way, could I get a photo of your ID just in case?

Just in case for?

Just in case I come home and all my stuff's gone?

Not that you'd do anything like that.

Like I said, just in case.

I thought you said your name was Jessie.

Yeah, everyone calls me Jessie.

I like it better.

Okay, let me just grab a photo of this.