Space Dandy (スペース☆ダンディ)

Dandy, that's a cow.

A wha--?

Holstein Friesian.

A mammal classified as order Artiodactyla,

family Bovidae, genus Bos.

Take a closer look.

I'm tellin' ya, this ain't a cow this is 'Grade A' alien.

Aren't ya?

Uh oh.

It looks like Miss Scarlet's about to go berserk again.

We'd better get outta here while we still can.

Excuse me.

Yes, ma'am?

Please don't kill us!

Good grief.

I just want to have a chat with you.

Dealing with alien hunters day in

and day out as I do,

I've become something of an expert at sizing them up.

So I can tell you: you three are,

by far, the worst hunters I've ever met.

I'm sorry, boys.

I hate to break it to you

but I don't think you're cut out for this job.

That's why, for your own sakes and my sanity,

I urge you to consider a career change.

The universe is a big place.

I'm sure the possibilities are endless.

Space Career Change Magazine, huh?

Man, what the hell does Scarlet know anyway?

These ain't gonna work.

They want college grads.

So much for there being

"endless possibilities."

Here's an ad looking for

space-truck drivers.

No degree required.

Now that you mention it,

I was a space truck driver before I hunted aliens.

Huh?

This is the first I've heard about it.

But you gotta have a special license

to drive a big rig truck, dontcha?

I can't really remember.

But I think I had one.

"You think."

In a universe where there are endless

possibilities, how did I end up gettin' stuck

with two of the biggest losers in all existence?

If only Dandy was a respectable

alien hunter; right now, I would be--

If only the mangy cat

and the bucket o' bolts weren't so useless;

right now, I would be--

If only Dandy and Meow were valiant warriors

instead of scatterbrains; right now, I'd be--

Hey man, you got a stray hair pokin' out your pomp.

What the--?

Dude. That's so gross.

Geez, how long is your hair?

I'm gettin' some resistance here.

Ow!

That's crazy!

They popped out of your perfectly

styled coif!

Yeah, but stranger things

have happened, buddy.

QT! Get me some info on 'em.

Roger.

No data available.

Do you think they could be

an undiscovered alien species, Dandy?

Wait. Your name's Dandy?

Yeah, and don't you forget it.

D-A-N-D-Y. Dandy.

What a small world.

My name is also D-N-A. It's Dandy.

You get the point.

Incidentally, my name's QT, also.

Impossible!

There's no way an old clunker like you

is the same model as me!

What about you, cat?

What's your name?

Why's everyone think I'm a cat?

I'm Meow.

What? That's weird; my name's Meow!

What the heck's goin' on?

This is way too freaky to be a coincidence.

Dandy!

I can't believe you took off without me!

That's a red card, Mister!

Honey!

Honey?

You mean, like the one from Boobies?

Aw, c'mon.

I can't afford anymore red cards.

Poor thing!

In that case, I'll make it a yellow card just for you!

Thanks, babe.

Dandy, what should we do about our "visitors"?

I dunno.

You think we should take 'em by the registration center?

That's a splendid idea!

They're gone!

I'll find 'em!

Big Punch!

There's no escaping me!

You might as well give up.

I'm the number one alien hunter,

with a one hundred percent capture rate!

You're getting a red card

for being way too cool!

Geez, as if I didn't hate

the guy enough already.

I'm sendin' him some bad juju.

That'll teach him to mess with me.

I doubt he's gonna be frightened

by threats of "bad juju."

Hey QT.

You've got a pube growin' out of your head.

Hmm?

Wouldn't we get there faster

if we just warped right meow, Dandy?

Don't be a dumbass.

If we move too fast we'll miss out on the amazin' view, baby.

Tell the truth!

He doesn't wanna warp 'cause he heard

a silly rumor that it makes your hair fall out.

Says the bald guy!

Hey, QT.

You're not bald, you've got a hair right up here!

Whoa.

Just where in the hell are we?

Hey, who are you guys?

If you're pirates, you better leave right meow!

"Meow"?

I'm starting to sense a pattern here.

Excuse me, sir, is your name Dandy?

Yeah, it is; how'd you know?

Ain't that somethin'?

I can't believe you're Dandy, QT, and Meow, too.

Yeah, talk about crazy coincidence, huh?

Is that this month's issue?

Dandy, you know it's dangerous

to travel with strangers,

so why won't you kick them meow-t?

You kiddin' me?

"Merry companions are a wagon in space", baby.

May I ask what brought

the three of you together?

Well, you see, Dandy is the

best trucker in the whole universe.

At first, QT and I were nothing more

than cargo he picked up for delivery.

But I was sent back

and the address on QT's shipping label was wrong.

That's when Dandy,

out of the kindness of his heart,

took us in and made us part of his team.

That's what makes him

the best trucker in the whole universe!

That's such a beautiful story.

Our Dandy sucks.

He could stand to learn a thing or two from theirs!

What in the--?

Hey, check out this centerfold!

Her underarm hair is in 3-D!

Are you okay, Meow?

What happened?

QT! I was just reading my comic book

when these weirdos popped out of it!

Then it's possible

that they're comic book characters!

Here's Dandy! Oh ah.

Huh?

Am I nuts or did he just say his name's Dandy?

Hey, old man!

You got a star-shaped birthmark?

Huh?

I've gotta gather all eight of the heroes

with star-shaped birthmarks in order

to defeat the evil demon king!

Okay.

Listen Dandy.

I don't trust these guys one bit.

They seem kinda sketchy.

What if they're the demon king's henchmen?

What?

Now that you mention it.

I think you're right, QT!

That guy definitely looks like Demon King

Black Cat's second cousin twice removed!

Huh?

Oh no!

Don't tell me you scoundrels have come here

to steal our Miracle Heartful Balls!

Your what?

I assure you,

we have no intention of touching your balls.