A Woman Scorned

Ah, fuck.

Fuck.

Asshole.

Oh my god.

Shit, sorry.

Go back to sleep.

Well, it's good to know the drivers

are as crazy here as they are at home.

No, they're much worse.

It's all the bad weather and nationwide alcoholism.

I can see why you fit in.

You shaking off any of that jet lag?

No, not even slightly.

Oh no, please don't tell me you've planned

some get up at 6:00 AM jam packed adventure holiday.

Oh come on, it'll be good for you.

You're gonna be out in nature chopping firewood,

getting your hands dirty.

You gotta get up, smell the daisies

and just grab life by the balls

- and start squeezing 'em. - Ow.

That's definitely not how the saying goes.

It's an English thing, you wouldn't know.

Oh.

Oh, right.

Yeah.

No.

You still listen to this crap?

Eject.

Stop.

Shut up.

No.

Ugh.

So stupid.

Oh god.

Well, this is us for the next few days.

It's cute.

Yeah.

All right, let's take five and get out there.

You're psychotic.

Come on then.

- Early bird catches the worm. - Oh god.

Is that how you talk now?

Yeah, it does sound a little dirty, doesn't it?

That's probably why you like it.

Ready?

Yep.

Wait up.

Break?

Yes.

Oh yeah.

You still doing that?

It's a special occasion.

Oh yeah?

How many special occasions you having a day?

God, you sound like Mom.

Well unfortunately for us,

apparently all women turn into their mothers.

I fuckin' hope not.

One was bad enough.

Hey, you wanna race?

No.

Ready, set, go.

Ugh.

Fuck.

- Come on, slowpoke! - Shit.

I hate running.

Breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth.

Come on, slowpoke.

Breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth.

That's it.

- Knees up. - Ow.

- Back straight. - Yeah.

There you go.

I can't believe I lost to a smoker.

Ah.

There's no fucking way I'm getting in there.

Holy shit.

- It's quite nippy. - Yeah.

- Oh my god. - That was fun.

No.

You only got your toe in.

That wasn't even fun.

- Fun thing. - I've never.

I can't believe you even talked me into doing that shit.

It was kinda too cold, I didn't even get in.

Hey!

Hey.

How you ladies doing?

You should join us, you hungry?

We're fine, thanks.

Laura, come on, let's go back.

Hey, you're not from around here, are ya?

- What do you think? - Perfect.

- Laura, let's go's back. - What?

It's fine, just ignore them.

- No, we really need to go. - Ah, come on.

We don't bite.

Yeah, unless you're into that.

Please.

All right.

Hey, where you girls staying?

Ah, come on now.

Back in the truck, lads, let's go.

Come on.

Hey, everything okay?

Yeah, he just reminded me of someone, you know?

You wanna talk about it?

No.

- I'm just being silly. - You're not.

I am getting better.

I know it doesn't feel like it but I am.

Did I tell you that I've started taking a defense class?

No.

Yeah.

It helps a little bit

but I still get these moments.

I didn't have the chance to tell you

how proud I am of you for leaving.

Here.

It's yours.

No.

I can't.

There's a reason Dad gave it to you.

Yeah, and there's a reason I want you to have it now.

You're stronger than you think.

Don't ever forget that.

I mean, you're not as strong as me but.

You're such a bitch.

Jas, have you had a drink yet?

No, but I was just about to.

I may have just used the last of our wine in the pie.

Can you go get some?

What, did you put a whole bottle of wine in the pie?

Yeah, there's wine in pie.

Yeah.

Can you go get some please?

What, and leave you in charge of all the cooking?

Hey, I've gotten much better.

- Uh-huh. - Yeah.

Listen, you're gonna have your mind blown

by my steak and kidney pie.

Steak and kidney?

- My god, is that a thing? - Yeah.

Oh.

- God. - It's good, I swear.

- Yeah, it looks it. - Yeah.

- Mm, tasty. - Mm.

Have faith in me, okay?

Yeah.

Oof.

Smells like cat food.

Do you want anything else?

Ooh, whiskey.

Okay, well I can get on board with that.

Yeah, thanks.

I love you.

That was quick.

You do know the speed limit's still in miles, right?

What the fuck do you want?

Perfect, boys.

What are a couple of Yankee girls doing out here anyway?

I'm a British citizen, asshole.

Oh.

Hmm.

Oh, listen to her.

"Asshole."

Asshole, right?

We never got your invitation, so

we figured we'd invite ourselves over.

See's how you were doing anyway.

Yeah, well, I'm doing fine, thanks.

So if you don't mind, get the fuck out.

Ooh hoo hoo.

Where's that friend of yours?

She left.

Is she coming back?

We had an argument.

And she took the car too?

That's not very nice of her now, is it?

I have a friend coming to pick me up.

They should be coming now.

I doubt that, darling.

Ah.

I wouldn't do that if I were you.

And here I was thinking you two were a couple of dikes.

We were taking bets on which one of you wore the strap-on.

Harry here was sure it was the skinny one

but my money's on you.

Laura, pick up your phone.

Why isn't she picking up the fucking phone?

Laura?

All you have to do is behave

and we'll be out of your hair.

Don't you fucking touch me.

If you don't behave,

things might get ugly.

Good girl.

- Whoa! - Ooh.

Shit.