My Doctor's Secret Life

(ice cubes clinking, liquid cascading)

Best NFL team ever.

-Best ever? -Yep.

Well, that's easy.

-1972 Miami Dolphins. -(he blows raspberry)

1985 Bears had the best players in the league

at every position on the field.

-Dolphins went undefeated, 17-0. -Oh-ho-ho!

Here you go!

Yeah, but the Bears had a quarterback

who could actually throw the football.

Oh, don't go there.

Dolphins scored more points than any other team that year.

-Bears. -Undefeated.

Bears. Look...

you guys got Shula, we got Ditka,

but come on.

We had the man with the goggles,

Walter Payton with the headband.

Are you kidding me?

Catch.

What was that?

You're getting a little rusty there, Miss Tight End.

Maybe use a little practice?

Oh yeah? You're on.

All right, okay, all right!

All right!

You got enough of 'em there!

Yeah...

You just ruined my entire day.

I had so many things to do.

-I like these kinds of days. -Me too.

-What are you doing later? -When? Tonight?

For the rest of your life?

You busy?

Look.

I know it's soon, but...

it's not that soon.

Hey, six months ago,

I fell in love with this incredible woman.

She doesn't know anything about football,

but she's amazing in the sack.

I ask you to marry me

and you whack me in the ribs!

You didn't ask me to marry you.

You just wanted to see if I would say yes.

You're right.

And now I know why you would say no.

-Why would I say no? -'Cause I'm a Bears fan.

-Yep, that's it. -I knew it!

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!

Hi, this is Rebecca Baxter.

I just wanted to thank you, Dr. West,

-for how much you helped me. -Hi!

She called four times yesterday.

Couldn't stop telling me how much you changed her life.

Sorry I'm late.

I had to write a paper for Developmental Psych

and I pulled an all-nighter.

-How's school going? -Uh...

I have so much work to do.

These online class deadlines don't give you any wiggle room

to be late.

At this pace, I'll have my PhD when I'm fifty.

Oh, hey, did you get the journals

from the medical library?

I...sorry, I forgot.

I've just been so busy.

Nancy, I need those for the book-signing

this weekend.

Okay, I know, I'll get them today.

Okay. Thanks.

-I'm feeling a lot better. -Great.

What makes you say that?

For one thing, I went to the mall yesterday.

Walked through a bunch of stores

and didn't get the urge.

So you did the breathing exercises?

Yep.

It worked. Thank you.

-You want some? -No, thanks.

Well, the good thing is, it's treatable.

A lot of doctors would prescribe medication,

but I'd rather not.

Dr. West, I, uh, really feel like I've turned the corner.

In fact, uh, I don't think I need any kind of treatment

-anymore. -That's terrific.

Um, looks like our time is up.

Okay.

Well, thank you.

Mm. David?

Kleptomania is very common

and it's nothing to be ashamed of.

We can beat this.

But we need to be honest.

Right?

Honesty, yeah.

That's what it's all about.

You're absolutely right.

-See you next week? -Yeah.

-Hi! -Hey.

-You look beautiful. -You do too.

Thanks.

-How was traffic? -Oh, not so bad.

So...this is for you.

Hey! Look at this.

Read the jacket, the back part.

"This book is dedicated to my mentor,

Dr. Elizabeth Summers,

who taught me everything I practice."

Veronica, you didn't have to do that.

I wanted to.

And it's true.

I love you.

What's the matter?

You don't think I should have written that about you?

No.

It's wonderful.

Everything you do is so wonderful.

Then what is it?

They laid you off?

My boss didn't even have the guts to tell me in person.

Instead, I get a form letter from the state capital.

You were their lead psychiatrist in their psych unit for what?

-Twelve years. -It's a government job.

-How can they do that? -Budget cuts.

They can do it.

So what are you gonna do now?

I don't know.

Hey, maybe you can start your own practice again.

Or--or find another state hospital

who needs somebody like you?

I'm not a kid anymore.

Do you really think that for a woman my age,

either of those scenarios are a remote possibility?

Sorry.

I was just trying to stay positive.

Like you taught me.

Yeah.

Like I taught you.

Congratulations.

Thanks.

We should order.

Lunch is on me.

Good news.

I talked to the publisher and got them to fork up

a huge chunk of cash for promotion.

I got you book signings and interviews in New York,

Boston, Atlanta, Houston, and Miami.

-Uh, consecutive? -Yep. You'll be gone

for six weeks starting in June.

What about my patients?

-Huh? -My patients.

I can't just leave them for six weeks.

They need me.

Oh, don't worry.

Your patients will be here when you get back.

Besides, once your book's a bestseller,

you'll be helping millions of people get better.