Wonderful! Liang Xi Mei (旺得福梁细妹)

It's really me. Long time no see. Hello everybody.

Please applause to welcome me. Thank you. Thank you.

Due to technical fault... Please don't block me.

...this movie, you see, has already become black and white.

Liang Ximei the movie is not going to be broadcasted.

- You can head home now. - Liang Popo, what are you doing?

Nothing, nothing.

I'm just telling them that the movie is about to start.

Everyone please turn off your phones.

- The colour's back. - Who is it?

Don't tell.

Actually, after turning off the phones you still can turn it on.

While you watch the movie, let it ring, then the movie won't be nice.

So everybody can hurry and head home.

It got my nose!

Robert, Albert.

Where are you guys?

Everyday I open my eyes

To face the life ahead of me

Don't be envious of what others have

And don't fret over the small things

A busy day starts from daybreak

Busy helping other people out

Never asking for any returns

An Auntie's life is destined to be so

Oh my... This is so vexing.

Oh my... This is so vexing.

Please excuse me. You've only seen me on the small screen.

This is my first time on a big screen. Doesn't it feel a bit strange?

I can understand. But you know, humans must seek progress.

Transiting from small to big is a good thing, isn't it?

I know many of you think that

I'm crazy, standing here and mumbling to myself.

Actually, I'm not talking to myself.

There are many people talking to me. They just love to listen my gossips.

I'm not lying. Here. Let me show you.

- Hi. - Hi Ximei.

- Hi Everybody. - Hi Ximei.

Say it with me. This is really.

So vexing.

How? Believe me now? I am not the crazy one. You guys are.

I know many friends have seen my home.

They've seen it so many times.

But actually, they've never seen what's inside.

Just what's on the outside. Today, I'm in a good mood.

So I'll bring you on a tour. Where do you want to go? My room?

So naughty.

Let me change my slippers first. They say to understand someone.

You must take a look at their room.

You guys are the first to see my room. Aren't you filled with awe?

Let's do this together. One, two, three.

Wow!

Wonderful! To tell the truth,

I feel like I've stripped and exposed myself.

No, no, no.

I meant that my room's all exposed to you guys.

We have to pamper ourselves.

I specially bought this 6-star hotel luxury bed

so that I can feel experience life in a palace.

I am that Queen. Let me tell you.

These represent who I am on the inside.

The spirit of a young girl lives inside me.

I know you guys will laugh at me. But it's ok. You always laugh at me.

Especially for this blouse. It has been a running joke.

Many say that. I've never washed this blouse.

Over the years, I'm always wearing the same thing.

Actually, I have more than one.

Don't believe me? Today, I can finally prove my case.

Let me tell you. I can finally prove you wrong.

Are you ready?

See this? I have so many of the same blouse.

See, you guys say it's the same.

But actually, the patterns are all different.

For every single piece.

This pattern and that pattern. They're different. Look.

This and this. Also different. You guys don't know how troubled I am.

Every morning, I ponder before all these clothes.

Which one should I wear? Because I am afraid that whichever I pick,

people will say that it's the same. But actually, they are all different.

You might want to know why do I love this print so much?

Actually, there's a reason for it.

Back then, my husband saved up $300 just to buy this branded blouse for me.

After he passed away, I missed him so much.

When I wear this blouse,

I feel like he is right next to me. Hugging me.

You have it good. Going off just like that.

Leaving me the responsiblities of a household and our sons.

Thank goodness I'm thrifty and managed to support the household.

Would have been great if you had left me some money.

Right. This is me when I was young.

Am I pretty? Vomit? I'm so pretty, but you guys want to vomit?

So annoying. Whatever I say is wrong. I'll stop then.

This is my room. Are you happy?

Still not happy? Want to see the room opposite?

What's wrong with you? Why would you want to see that room?

Ok, since you're curious...

For ten over years, no one knows what's inside.

Let me show you. Don't worry. What you see now

is how it usually is. It's normal. These four lying here.

They are all alive. Just that they are not moving.

Even if a nuclear bomb was to go off. They will not wake up.

This is the room of the useless Robert.

When he got married he told me. Mother, let me stay here for a while.

After I applied for a house, I'll move out.

I waited... And see his children are so big now.

Strange how long his house application took.

It's useless to say so much. Just like this, he's here to stay.

Sometimes he doesn't even pay for boarding costs.

Let's stop here. The house's on fire.

Fire. Fire. Fire. The house's on fire.

See, they just won't wake up. Let's hope there'll never be a fire here.

If not, they'll all roast to death.

Please excuse me for showing you this ugly side of our family.

Actually, in our house,

there's another place which you often see. But never had a chance to enter. Remember?

I always rush out from there to talk to you guys.

But you've never had a change to head in. I'll bring you for a tour now.

This is my kitchen. It's not different from any other kitchen.

Although it's small, it has all the essentials.

As you know, I have two sons. One's Robert, the other's Albert.

Look at the aprons they've given me and you'll know how they see me.

This is from Albert. To me, I'm sexy and...

Perfect.

Robert gave me one too. Look. What did he give me?

I'm an old hen to him. Old hen.

If you are a mother. Don't you think you'll be biased too?

No choice.

Whatever Albert likes, I'll cook it for him.

He loves fried eggs. So I'll fry them for him.

They're all up.

You two are finally got up? Weren't you sleeping like a pig?

Granny, I couldn't sleep. Because I had a nightmare.

Nightmare?

- What did you dream of? - I dreamt that...

My tummy was hungry. It's a hungry nightmare.

Ok. Eat this and you won't be hungry.

- Seriously. - Granny.

Don't mind me asking. You are always talking to yourself.

Are you sick?

Nonsense. Who's sick? I'm talking to myself

to keep my mind agile.

Look at your Great-Grandpa. Sitting there as still as a stone.

Hello? Father, father.

See, no movement. He seems really ill.

In computer terminology, this is called... Put to sleep.

Granny, do you know.

In sleep mode, once you touch it, it'll start moving.

But for Great-Grandpa,

no matter how I poke him, he still doesn't move.

What then?

It's like he hang.

Hang?

Then how?

If restarting doesn't work. You can throw him away.

Rubbish. Eat your breakfast. Enough nonsense.

Throw away? You kids are the luckiest.

Just open your eyes. And you'll have food and money.

Granny, why are you adults always automatically talking about money?

Is money really that important?

Granny's not the only one.

Even the school talks about money. This needs money, that needs money.

Everything needs money.

See, even Fatty is speaking for Granny.

You're right. Let me tell you. This world is all about money.

You guys are still young. You don't know the importance of money.

When you grow up, you'll understand. Where's the coffee? I'll go get it.

- Morning Mother. - Morning Mummy.

Good boy. You made your own sandwich. I'll make drinks for you.

Drink this in the morning. It's good for you.

Your father and uncle used to love this too.

It's yummy.

Good morning Grandpa, Mother, Sister-in-law.

Morning.

Eggs. My favourite.

Thank you Mother.

Mother, jam for you.

I asked you for $1,500 yesterday to start an online business.

Do you have it?

Will I dare to not have it?

Let me tell you, you youngsters

should always have some savings.

Don't just blindly use credit cards.

And spend money you do not have.

When you have a job,

you should save about 10 or 20% of it.

To prepare for rainy days.

So you can support yourself for at least 3 to 6 months.

- That is a lot safer. - Morning.

- $1,500 for you. - Thank you.

$1,500 all at once?

Give me $150.

What you said is unfair.

When you first stepped into society. How many $1,500 have I given you?

- You tell me. Don't give me that. - Yes.

Did you forget? You jinxed your dad when you were born.

He got into a car accident.

We had to beg for money to foot the bills.

Did you forget that? Also, when you were studying,

you actually set someone's car on fire. We had to get money to pay them back too.

Did you forget all these? Still dare to talk to me about money.