Camelot

Guenevere, Guenevere

In that dim, mournful year

Saw the men she held so dear

Go to war for Guenevere

The rules of battle are not for Lancelot Du Lac, Your Majesty.

Let us attack now while they sleep.

We will attack when I give the command, at dawn.

Merlyn...

...why is Jenny in that castle...

...behind walls I cannot enter?

How did I blunder into this...

...agonizing absurdity?

When did I stumble? Where did I go wrong?

Should I not have loved her?

Then I should not have been...

...born.

Oh, Merlyn...

...how did it happen?

I haven't got much time.

A thin inch of sunlight...

...the arrows begin to fly.

Merlyn...

...if I am to die...

...in battle...

...please do not let me die...

...bewildered.

Think, Arthur.

Think back.

Think back.

Think back!

Oh, Merlyn!

Think back.

Think back!

Think...

...back.

Back! To one of the most important days of your life.

Oh, yes, heh!

Hello.

My name is Arthur.

I think I'll call you...

...Wart.

"I think I'll call you Wart."

No, no, no!

Now you've gone too far back.

Shoo, shoo, shoo!

Not the day you met me!

The day you met Guenevere.

The day she came...

...to Camelot.

That's the beginning.

Yes.

I know...

...what my people...

...are thinking tonight.

I know what my people

Are thinking tonight

As home through the shadows They wander

Everyone smiling in secret delight

As they stare at the castle and ponder

Whenever the wind blows this way

You can almost hear everyone say...

...I wonder what the king Is doing tonight

What merriment is the king Pursuing tonight?

The candles at the court They never burned as bright

I wonder what the king Is up to tonight

How goes the final hour As he sees the bridal bower

Being legally and regally prepared?

Well, I'll tell you what the king Is doing tonight

He's scared Oh, he's scared

You mean that a king who fought a dragon Whacked him in two and fixed his wagon

Goes to wed in terror and distress?

Oh, yes!

A warrior who's so calm in battle Even his armor doesn't rattle

Faces a woman petrified with fright?

Right!

You mean the appalling clamoring That sounds like a blacksmith hammering

Is merely the banging Of his royal knees?

Please!

You wonder what the king Is wishing tonight?

He's wishing he were In Scotland fishing tonight

What occupies his time While waiting for his bride?

He's searching high and low For someplace to hide

And, oh, the expectation The sublime anticipation

He must feel about The wedding night to come

Well, I'll tell you what the king Is feeling tonight

He's numb! He shakes! He quails! He quakes!

And that's what the king is doing

Tonight!

How long before we get to Camelot?

Soon, ma'am, but don't look out there, it's a ghastly forest.

It's the most ferocious, savage...

...terrifying forest I've ever seen.

I simply adore it.

Does Your Ladyship not realize that this forest is crawling...

...with outlaws and brigands?

Oh, Clary! You think there's a chance of meeting one?

Don't say it, ma'am.

It would be marvelous.

Imagine, ma'am, soon you will not only meet the man you will marry...

...but His Majesty, King Arthur of England.

And one is the other. What have you to say to that?

Oh, Clary.

Was there ever a more inconvenient marriage of convenience?

I am at the golden age of seductability, and is my fate sealed with a kiss?

Is it? No, sealed with a seal!

Where are all the simple joys

Of maidenhood?

Where are all those Adoring, daring boys?

Where's the knight pining so for me?

He leaps to death in woe for me

Oh where are a maiden's simple joys?

Shan't I have the normal life A maiden should?

Shall I never be rescued in the wood?

Shall two knights never tilt for me

And let their blood be spilt for me?

Oh, where are the simple joys

Of maidenhood?

Shall I never be disputed for

Or on any minstrel's lips?

Never have my face recruited for

Launching countless ships?

Where are the simple joys Of maidenhood?

Are those sweet, gentle pleasures Gone for good?

Shall a feud not begin for me?

Shall kith not kill their kin for me?

Oh where are the trivial joys?

Harmless, convivial joys?

Where are the simple joys

Of maidenhood?

Halt!

Her Highness will rest here while the Royal Hairdresser...

...attends her.

Can someone help with this canopy?

Take that case down and bring it over here.

Hurry up now, would you, please?

Careful now.

Clarinda.

I should like some tea while I'm being coifed.

Yes, Your Highness.

Can he get somebody to help there?

You, you come over here and help me.

Bring that horse over here. He needs water.

St. Genevieve.

St. Genevieve

It's Guenevere

Remember me?

St. Genevieve

St. Genevieve

I'm over here, beneath this tree!

You know how faithful and devout I am

You must admit I've always been a lamb

But Genevieve, St. Genevieve

I won't obey you anymore You've gone a bit too far

I won't be bid and bargained for Like beads at a bazaar

St. Genevieve, I've run away Eluded them and fled

And from now on I intend To pray to someone else instead

Oh, Genevieve, St. Genevieve

Where were you When my youth was sold?

Dear Genevieve

Sweet Genevieve

Shan't I be young before I'm old?

A thousand pardons, my lady.

Don't run, I won't harm you.

You lie! You'll leap on me and throw me down!

I'll do no such thing.

You'll carry me off on your shoulder!

No, I swear by the sword Excalibur I won't touch you.

Why not?

How dare you insult me in this fashion? Do my looks repel you?

- No, you're beautiful! - Did you hear me praying?

I couldn't help it. You did pray loudly.

So you know who I am?

Yes, you're Guenevere.

So that accounts for your polite, respectful, despicable behavior?

Oh.

Why isn't Merlyn here?

- Who? - Merlyn. He's my teacher.

He's the wisest man alive. He'd know what to do. He lives backwards.

- Beg your pardon? - He lives backwards.

He doesn't age. He...

...youthens?

He can remember the future...

...so he can tell you what you'll do in it.

Come here.

Please.

Close your eyes.

Please.

Now just turn, gently.

Now....

Very slowly, open them.

Do you see that castle?

Yeah.

It used to light up in a sort of pink glow.

When I was young, everything looked a little pink to me.

But then, one....

When Merlyn left, he took all the pink with him.

Don't stare. It's rude.

Who are you?

Well....

Actually, they call me Wart, actually.