Suits

You're wearing a gray tie.

This is acceptable at a black tie affair.

There's nothing wrong with the tie that I'm wearing.

Champagne, sir?

Is it? From the region?

In France?

Because if it's not, it's called sparkling wine,

And I don't really drink sparkling wine.

- Forget it. - Forgive him.

His parents really wanted a girl.

Never got over it.

Wait a minute. You can taste the difference.

I'm not being a snob.

Not a snob?

You sound like frasier's brother.

Niles crane was completely misunderstood.

Okay, boys, you don't want me

To give you a time-out now, do you?

Look, I'd be willing to stand

In a corner if you agree to paddle his bottom.

That's hilarious.

I'm just saying that if they want us to donate

To their charity, they might as well step it up.

You know, make me want to give away my money.

Your money?

You're here representing the firm, louis.

And we've always been committed

To giving back to the community.

Jessica, is that...

Tori. Yes, and I owe her a call.

Excuse me.

Do I smell like sausage?

No more than usual. Why?

Uh, because I'm about to meet the future mrs. Louis litt.

I had pizza before I came and I just want to make sure

I still am not emanating any aroma.

Oh, you're emanating something.

It's called pheromones and women find it irresistible.

Watch this.

Harvey.

You remember tori?

Of course. Nice to see you.

I told jessica I don't really want to talk shop

While we're here to support a good cause.

Well, that's the beautiful thing about a retainer.

We're always on call when you need us.

So how can we help?

It involves one of our most trusted senior vps.

Something recently came to light about his past

And I'm shocked by it, really.

You tell us where it hurts and we'll make it go away.

Oh!

Uh... Ooh.

Wait. Wait.

- Wait? - Yeah.

Well, it's just...

This feels like it's moving really fast.

I should slow down?

No, I just... I mean, like...

I just got out of a relationship and...

Right.

You kind of did too.

I wasn't really seeing anyone.

You know what I mean.

Trevor.

Yeah, trevor.

Right. Trevor.

Um, ahem.

Yeah, yeah, you're right.

We should slow down.

I should make us some tea.

- You want some tea? - Mm-hmm, yeah.

Yeah, let's drink some tea.

Thank you.

What's the, uh, harvard club?

Oh, it's, uh... it's, like, this clubhouse

For harvard alumni.

Yeah, that invite is, uh...

It's for this networking thing for lawyers.

I got it at work.

Hmm, would you go?

What? Are you kidding me?

No.

I have a hard enough time pretending at work.

It's not like I want to enter the lion's den.

Well, if you were gonna go...

And you were gonna take a date...

It would be you.

I'd love to take you.

Uh-oh. Uh-oh!

Who's moving too fast now?

Oh, well, that's due to saying all the right things.

Hey, what's the emergency?

Couldn't find a date to the prom?

We're firing stan jacobson.

Who?

Senior vice president, drybeck accounting.

- Our accounting firm? - Yes.

They're our firm and our client.

How's that possible?

They signed a conflict of interest waiver.

Look at that.

He's actually learning how the law works.

Acquaint yourself with drybeck's company charter

And stan's original employment contract.

- What'd he do? - He lied.

He lied? About what?

Wait, let me guess. He cooked the books.

God, doesn't anyone on wall street

Put in an honest day's work anymore?

Actually, he's got a stellar record as a senior vp.

He lied on his resume.

Never got his cpa license.

Never even went to business school.

He lied about where he went to school

And now he's getting fired?

Drybeck does the books for half of wall street.

Word gets out that a senior staff is a fraud,

They're gonna start bleeding clients.

We have to do this fast and keep it quiet.

Relax.

That's not gonna happen to you.

But I would get fired if jessica found out.

Found out what?

Just told me he's a virgin.

That doesn't surprise me one bit.

All in due time, mike.

You have those severance quotes?

jojimoreau on Addic7ed present:

Suits - 1 x 10 - The Shelf Life

Oh, where you headed, doll?

Pearson hardman to see mike ross.

Uh, he expecting you?

No, I just was gonna drop this off.

No appointment. I can't let you up.

Do I look like a terrorist?

Do I look like I want to lose my job?

Jenny?

Rachel.

Hey. You here to see mike?

Sort of. I just...

I was gonna drop this suit off for him.

Harvey called late last night,

Some big emergency,

And mike ended up staying the night.

Actually, could you help me ou

I'm running so late to work.

Sure.

Oh, my god. Thank you.

Oh.

Thanks.

- Thank you. - Okay.

Oh!

And can you tell mike that I left the key under the mat?

Absolutely.

Thank you so much, rachel.

- You're welcome. - You're amazing.

Ahem.

Uh!

I'm up. I'm up.

Your girlfriend stopped by.

Dropped that off for you.

Girlfriend?

You guys move in together already?

What? No.

We... she's not my... why do you care?

I don't. What...

What was the big emergency last night?

Um, harvey.

He's firing some big vp from our accounting firm this morning.

Stan jacobson?

Yeah, why? You know him?

No, he was just checking in at reception when I got there.

What?

Oh, god! I got to change.

I will let him know that you will be right there.

- Thanks. - Mm-hmm.

Performance numbers, hr guidelines,

Severance quotes, and stan's in the waiting room.

Did you sleep here last night?

I wouldn't exactly call it sleeping.

Where'd you get that suit?

Uh, rachel.

No, I mean jenny gave it to rachel downstairs.

She slept over last night.

Jenny did, not rachel.

Do I really need to be here when you fire this guy?

You want to learn how it's done, right?

I read this guy's employment records, harvey.

He's smart, talented, loyal.

Oh, and you feel bad for him.

I'm shocked.

Where's my smoking gun?

Background check that confirmed stan lied

About his credentials.

It never came through.

On it.

Come in, come in.

Um, could you help me with something?

I need to get this fax for harvey and it's...